What I want you to know as someone who works at a movie theater.

I have been working at the same movie theater on and off for three years. For the most part I know my theater inside and out and could probably do my job in my sleep but I do not because I do enjoy working. I am friends with everyone who works there and have met some of my closest friends there so to say I love it there would be an understatement.

1. Asking for free stuff is not okay.

I have never been someone who does this but after all the people who ask me free stuff I know I never will start doing it. The only free things I have to give are napkins and straws. If you think you need twenty plus napkins with your popcorn by all means take them but I cannot give an extra tub of popcorn just so you and friends do not have to reach over each other to share.

2. The prices are set and I cannot change them.

Despite popular belief I cannot change the price of popcorn just because you ask me to. There is no secret question that you have to ask to get a cheaper price, everyone pays the same amount. I understand that it is expensive and that you did just drop forty dollars so the whole family can watch Finding Dory but that is not an excuse to change the prices. Also despite popular belief you can watch a movie without getting popcorn. I know it seems weird and unethical but it is possible.

3. Children are sometimes loud during children’s movies.

If a child if yelling or crying then yes they should be taken out of the theater but if a child is just laughing really loud during Finding Dory they are not in the wrong. If you choose to see a movie with the ideal audience being age two to age twelve can you really complain about a child being in the theater? Kids love movies and might get into the movie a little too much. Sometimes a joke goes over their head and they ask why their parents are laughing but they paid to enjoy the same movie as you did and they are just trying to get the most out of the movie. Want to see a children’s movie and not be disturbed by the children in there go during school hours r late at night although it is still not garneted that there will not be a child the likely is smaller than say Sunday at two in the afternoon.

4. Cleaning up after yourself is not that hard.

It is one thing to spill some popcorn and candy on the ground and a completely different thing to leave everything you bought in the seats once your movie is over. I understand that sometimes you forget to grab your drink or your bag of popcorn but not everyone who has left their stuff behind has forgotten about it. It takes longer to clean the theater when I have to grab all drinks, bags, and candies left behind as well as making me run up and down several times.

5. Just because we do not offer a food items means that you can bring it in.

Most people just sneak in their other food items then try to convince you they should bring it in. I am not being mean by not letting you bring in your food I am just simply doing my job and following company policy. The big problem with that is the extra work I now have to do. The concession stand is what pays my pay check so by you making me clean up your food is you basically taking money away from me. Just because we do not serve coffee does not mean you can bring in your Starbucks. It is plain and simple, if you want to eat during your movie you need to order something we serve here. If you want to save some money and not spend it on concessions then just eat before, I am sure you have heard the term dinner and a movie before.

6. There is nothing I can do about the long lines.

I am working as fast as I can just like my other fellow employees. There are not fifteen people hiding in the back who can just swoop in and make the lines shorter. Everyone you see working is everyone we have. I understand that you had to wait in line for thirty minutes but it is seven o’clock on a Friday night with the new Captain America movie premiering, what did you expect? I really cannot pity you for waiting in line since I have had a line of people almost out the door for the past hour and a half and there does not seem like there is going to be a break soon. I am sorry you had to wait so long but hey at least you know you will have fresh popcorn.

7. Unsalted popcorn does not work like McDonalds unsalted fries.

Unsalted French fries are at least fried. Unsalted popcorn is just cardboard there is no way around it. Even if you sprinkle the popcorn salt on it after it had been cooked it is still not the same. If you just really want that hot out of the popper popcorn then just tell me and I will make you a batch.

8. The orange powder in the shakers is not cheese.

I do not know who started the rumor of that stuff being cheese but it is not and you need to know it. It is a buttered salt, it is the same stuff we put in the popper while the popcorn is popping. It should only be put on in light doses because it is salt and very strong. When I watch you dump a bunch on and them walk away I think about how long it will take for you to realize you cannot handle that much salt and want some new popcorn. I try to tell everyone I can that it is not cheese but in fact salt so please help me spread the word.

9. If your child can walk on its own and speak in sentences it has to pay.

A child’s ticket starts at age one; if they are under the age of one then they do not have to pay. It is that simple. By telling me your child’s age in months does not trick me into thinking you do not have to pay for them. I know I only make minimum wage but I do know that 36 months is older than a year. And also if your child is not the reason you are watching the seventeenth Ice Age movie to come out them maybe you should be rethinking your movie choices.

10. You have to be seventeen to have a ticket for a R-rated movie.

Just because you go with someone who is seventeen does not automatically make you also seventeen. A bartender would not give an alcoholic drink just because your friend is twenty one. The same applies for the movie theater. If you are not seventeen you have to go with a parent or legal guardian and your older boyfriend/girlfriend is not your legal guardian, or least at I hope not because then you have some real problems. Also your parent cannot just buy you a ticket they have to go into the movie and watch it with you. We do not just ID at the ticket office most theaters ID in more than just one location so if you get by without buying the ticket you are probably not going much further and your mom will have to turn around her minivan and pick you up.