We've all come to a time in our life where we find ourselves lost in our own world. It could be that we are so engulfed into our own lives that we don't take the time to take a deep breath and realize the things that are going on around us. Or maybe it's a different type of lost. This type of feeling is more than being lost in your own world, but being lost in the whole world altogether.
I can say that I've been there before. If someone were to ask me to explain this feeling right that second, I probably would not be able to, but now that I am someone who is on the way of figuring herself out, I can finally put words together in describing this feeling.
1. Happy, but sad.
It's not that we feel sad. It's not that we are depressed. Don't get that wrong. We can be happy sometimes - and in fact, sometimes we can be so happy that we tend to forget that we feel lost. But once that happiness is over, it's like a rush of anxiety and sadness hovers over. Anxiety because we see that we're back to square one - being lost again. So yeah, we can be happy, but simultaneously sad at the same time.
2. Alone in a crowded room
Have you ever stepped into a room and felt like you were so alone? Probably when you walked into a room full of strangers. Well, imagine this feeling everyday, except you're in a room filled with the people you know so well. Sometimes it just feels like you don't fit in right with the people, or sometimes it just feels like you're being left out. And even worse, sometimes it feels like you're not good enough to feel at peace to be around these people. It's not them. It's probably us overthinking because we tend to do that now.
3. Never satisfied
The things that used to satisfy you somehow just doesn't make any sense to you now. It doesn't satisfy you, and it always seems like you can do better. You just don't know how to be better, and every time that you try to be - you find yourself getting frustrated that you're not being the "better" that you want to see.
4. What is purpose? What is passion?
What is the purpose of all that we are doing? What are we here for? Not questioning our life, but what is it that we want to do for the rest of our lives that will keep us going? Passion is what we want to do for the rest of our lives, so we find ourselves fighting for that. Whatever we want to pursue on, there has to be passion.
5. And finally, lost and found
On the route of being lost, we somehow find ourselves. And things just seem to be clearer then. Things start to make more sense. It may suck to be in the journey of feeling lost, like you do not know what to do, but in the end it's worth it. Because all in all, how can you really find yourself if you don't know how it feels to be lost?