I want to be a wife, a mother, and a career woman. I don’t want to be a trophy wife or a housewife, but I won’t judge those who don’t want to be wives, mothers, and career women.
Because, simply put, some people are just not cut out for those things.
Society puts pressure on women to want to be wives and mothers, and expect them to be superwomen with jobs. They always have to look perfect, otherwise, they get judged if they don't. Yet, if a girl says she just wants to be a housewife or a trophy wife, the whole world groans and rolls their eyes.
I admit: I have done it myself. I have judged women for their choices and I need to stop doing that. We all do. After all, if it doesn’t affect me in any way, what do I care what another woman does with her life?
If a woman wants to devote herself to raising her children, then all the more power to her. I like the idea that some kids come home to parental supervision, not a nanny or no one there at all. One of my close friends wants to be a housewife once she’s married and starts a family of her own. She’s loving, nurturing, and adores children—a life of domestic bliss as a stay-at-home mom is ideal for her.
As for me, not so much.
This is going back to what I said earlier about individual women being built for certain things. For example, I’m not built to be a homemaker or stay-at-home mom. Sure, it would be fine if my kids were little. I can be home for them rather than rely on a babysitter or a mother-in-law. Plus, getting to read and brainwash the kids with Disney movies all day once the chores are done? Sounds awesome!
Then, my kids would start preschool, then kindergarten, then first grade, etc. Once the playtime and afternoon cartoons are done, even having nothing to do but read all day sounds boring, no matter how many books I have.
And my future kids would hate me if I were stuck inside the house all day.
I like making money. I like working and keeping my brain active. I feel it would be unfair of me to put all the pressure on my future husband to be the sole provider when I am perfectly capable of contributing. Besides, I’m uncomfortable with depending financially on men after so many years of doing so with my loving, wonderful but overprotective and slightly sexist Portuguese father.
On that front, despite what the feminists say, not all women want careers. That’s fine and that’s their choice. Besides, it is sweet to think of a guy willing to take care of you and you never have to worry about anything other than looking pretty. I can see why so many women find the idea of trophy wife appealing.
To some women, the idea of being a wife or even a mother in general in unappealing. Instead, they get their satisfaction from their careers or spending their money traveling the world. They like the idea of having multiple lovers instead of one. They are more in tune with the idea of loading up their nieces and nephews with ice cream before giving them back to Mom rather than being called Mom themselves. They enjoy their independence. As long as friends and family surround them, they don’t need anything else.
Some women only want to be wives and some women even only want to be mothers. Many of my friends have expressed such desires. It is all about what the individual woman wants.
I have mentioned it already, but I do want to be a wife and mother. I want to come home every day to a man’s love and children’s laughter. I want that support system, acceptance, and unconditional love. I’ll even take all the turmoil and trials that come with it. I don’t want to come home to an empty house with leftovers.
But if you are a woman that wants to come home to silence, to sit on your couch with your glass of wine, your cat, and just relax, then you do you, my girl.
