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A Womanless Beauty Pageant

Presented by Alpha Sigma Tau.

Kellsie Davis

Apr 19, 2016

Rogers State University

2695

Kellsie Davis

In 2012, I had the unbelievable pleasure to assist the Alpha Sigma Tau sorority on Rogers State University's campus with a pageant. But this wasn't just any kind of pageant—this was a Womanless Beauty Pageant.

The Womanless Beauty Pageant is just as it sounds: Woman-less. It is a beauty pageant featuring men. We were lucky enough to have fraternity men as well as a few other men on campus willing to prance around the stage of the auditorium wearing heels and dresses. They looked great, let me tell you.

These boys went all out and did not disappoint: Makeup, wigs, dresses, and there were even some short shorts going on. These boys presented their talents (or lack there of), but it was OK because it was just that hilarious. Men dancing, singing, playing instruments, and running around the stage with a ribbon.

It sounds awesome, doesn't it? Well fret not! On April 19, 2016, Alpha Sigma Tau will be presenting it again!

Prizes, "beautiful ladies," and laughter are just three things to look forward to. But don't take it from me!

We'd love to see you there!

Anyone is welcome to come out, and enjoy an evening of entertainment!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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A Womanless Beauty Pageant

Presented by Alpha Sigma Tau.

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It's not all morning coffees and singing along to the radio.

You can't just go to your room to take a nap in the middle of your classes.

Having to spend all your extra cash on gas for your car.

Speaking of money, you probably don't have a meal plan so you're forced to scrounge up some change or mooch off of your friends.

It can be harder to maintain the friendships you make with people from class.

Finding a parking spot.

It can be harder to be involved on campus because between your one, two, or three jobs and school you don't have much free time.

When you try to be super involved on campus, it can kill your sleep schedule.

It's impossible to do homework at home, but staying on campus isn't an option sometimes.

There are surveys and events that you can't participate in because you're a commuter.

Group projects are the bane of your existence.

Traffic.

Your backpack rivals that of a survivalist trekking in the woods.

Driving all the way to campus to find a note on the door of your classroom saying class was cancelled.

Because have you ever had to endure grilling your foot on a George Foreman?

1. When he just wanted bacon from his George Foreman grill

2. When he had money (and Jan) issues

3. When he got upstaged at Phyllis' wedding

4. When he unintentionally saved Meredith from rabies

5. When he wore a "bisexual" suit

6. When he had to apologize to Jesus

7. When his GPS drove him into a lake

8. When he had to deal with Ryan as his boss

9. When he couldn't fulfill his most generous empty promise

10. When this happened

11. When he struggled with a X-Mas break up

12. When he had to defend his generosity

13. When he threw a classy Christmas party for Holly but she had a boyfriend

14. When he had to stand up to peer pressure

15. When Toby was "Toby-ish"

This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

Run Around Clanging Pots and Pans in Everyone's Face

Eat the Last Few Pigs in a Blanket

Pop Twelve White Grapes

Burn Something

Smash Things Against a Wall

Spontaneously Begin an Irish Jig

Call Your Mother

Throw a Coffee Table Out a Window

Sing "Auld Lang Syne" at the Top of Your Lungs

Do Some Squats

Swan Dive into a Nearly Freezing Body of Water

Take a Shot

Time to be merry and bright.

"First Noel" by Leslie Odom, Jr

"A Holly Jolly Christmas" by Burl Ives

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" by Kelly Clarkson

"All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey

"Christmas (Baby Please Come Home" by Michael Buble

"Last Christmas" by Taylor Swift

"The Christmas Song" by Josh Groban

"White Christmas" by Idina Menzel

"O Holy Night" by David Archuleta

"Believe" by Josh Groban

"Les cloches du hameau" by Celine Dion

Or at least try to do.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

2. I will look decent for class.

3. I will go to the gym more.

4. I will go to the library and study more.

5. I will meet new people.

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