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Adulting 101

A look back on how far I have come from my rocky start in college.

Vanessa Mirasola

Dec 27, 2016

Poetry Enthusiasts

Better Ed

When did I become a woman?

They say it’s your first period, but was I really a woman at ten?

When did the scared little girl, become a terrified young woman?

I am 18 with the outfittings of a fully grown female

Able to bear offspring and the like

But I can’t nail down a gig that’s more than $8.25

Every

Goddamn

Hour

I have wiry hair that sprawls like clouds

And nails nubby and rough

Am I a woman?

An adult even?

I do not strut heel toe on pavement

I skulk in and around slipped dreams, failed promises

Hoping no one sees me floating in and out of doubtful existence

Hold me close please, let me pretend I am safe in your arms

Don’t adults shoo their own monsters away?

I do not remember the turn I took

That brought me from childish point A

To slovenly adult point B

Trading juice for Juice came easy enough

But being told to make adult gold from child straw

Has my knocked knees bowing under the pressure

Boundless youth into bounded maturity

Feet in shoes 5 times too large

Womanhood is this

Growing up is this

Adulthood is this

I don’t want this

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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Hopefully they will make you laugh.

1. Why are towels considered dirty when you get out of the shower clean?

2. Who closes the bus door once the bus driver gets off?

3. Why is there a "d" in "fridge" but not in "refrigerator"?

4. If you drop soap on the floor is the floor clean or the soap dirty?

5. Is the "S" or the "C" silent in the word "scent"?

6. Does expecting the unexpected make the unexpected the expected?

7. Would Lightning McQueen buy car insurance or life insurance?

8. Who put the alphabet in alphabetical order?

9. What color are mirrors?

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