I would like to believe that the world has evolved past the point that a woman is worth more than a marriage license.
Moreover, I would like to believe that a marriage license has nothing to do with a woman’s worth to herself, her family or community.
Unfortunately, this is not the case.
In modern day China, parents fill the marriage markets with pictures and resumes of their single daughters hoping to find a suitor for their daughter. Women past a certain age and unmarried are considered “leftover”.
Yes, marriage markets. As if their daughters’ relationship status is something to be bought and sold.
These markets undermine the many wonderful accomplishments of these women. Many of these women have a college education, own businesses and are making decisions are grown independent women. Any parent would see these achievements as something to boast. Surely, they realize that their daughter has infinite value and potential that has nothing to do with whether or not she is married.
Sure- if their daughter was a boy.
Oddly enough (truly I’m shocked), there are no marriage markets for men. Men do not face similar pressure to get married and have children. For some reason, women’s accomplishments in other aspects of their lives (that has nothing to do with matrimony or child-rearing) is overlooked or underappreciated. If she chooses to delay getting married or opts out of having children, she is selfish.
Yet, if a man makes a similar decision…what is he?
A man. He is a man and few people challenge his decision to be alone.
The most heartbreaking aspect of this double standard is how the women internalize their self-worth. Despite their accomplishments, they are led to think and believe less of themselves.
Regrettably the same double standard exists in the United States.
I want to say that the United States has evolved beyond this but the truth of the matter is that we are debased enough to reduce women to their marital status, the number of children they do (or do not) have, or their age. We have “American” leftovers.
This should go without saying, but I will risk redundancy for the sake of advocating the truth.
A woman’s worth is in how she sees herself. Her worth is determined by her self-respect, dignity, independence and self-esteem. It has nothing to do with her age or her marital status.
A woman is worth infinitely more than a marriage license.
