Fear.
It can eat us alive.
It can ruin our lives.
It can keep us from trying new things.
It can make overall happiness more difficult to obtain.
It can keep us from ridding our life of toxic friendships and creating new ones.
It can keep us in a toxic environment because we are too afraid to leave.
It can make stupid decisions more common.
It can give us regrets.
It can make us put up a front to society, portraying a person whose life is perfect when we are really crying inside.
It can prevent us from living our best life.
Fear.
It has controlled my life for too long, and I am saying goodbye to it for good.
On October 1, the world was horrified and devastated when news began circulating that there was a mass shooting in Las Vegas, Nevada at a country music festival. The shooting resulted in the loss of 58 people (excluding the shooter) and more than 500 injuries.
For Americans, sadly, mass shootings have become all too common so have our words following the tragic events.
With past mass shootings like the Aurora, Colorado movie theater shooting, Sandy Hook Elementary School, and Pulse nightclub lingering in the back of our minds, we know exactly what to say on our social media accounts because these tragic events have become all too common.
We call on politicians and lawmakers to toughen gun laws and make it more difficult to gain access to a gun, we question why these terrible tragedies keep occurring and why no one is doing anything about it, and we send our "thoughts and prayers" to those impacted.
As I continue to wrap my head around the terrible tragedy that occurred and grapple with the fact that the world is so broken, I have realized something and I have decided to make a lifestyle change because of it.
The "2017 Las Vegas Strip Shooting" is what news outlets and Wikipedia are calling this. I call it a horrifying, senseless tragedy that should have never occurred, along with the dozen other mass shootings that have taken place in the past decade.
It’s always hard to hear about a tragic event like this, but this one hits close to home because as a country music fan, this is the type of event I might have been at, had it not been thousands of miles away.
With stars like Jake Owen, Maren Morris, and Jason Aldean frequenting the event, this festival is a country music lover’s dream - a chance to sing your head off, dance so much your legs feel like jello, and just escape from reality for a few days and watch your favorite artists perform. Who wouldn’t want to attend an event like that?
This tragedy is especially hard to read about because this could have happened to me; this could have happened to any of us.
With revelations circulating saying that the gunman had previously booked multiple hotels room at a hotel overlooking Lollapalooza this past summer but never showed up, we come to realize that this was an attack that could have happened to another group of music lovers, only of a different genre.
Many of us look to music is an outlet of our everyday lives, something that helps us forget the problems we are dealing with; our safe space has been violated and a fear has been instilled in all of us. When attending concerts in the past, I have never once questioned "Will I make it out alive?" just as I have never felt unsafe in any venue I have ever been at. That's what music does to us; it makes us feel safe.
That lifestyle change I was talking about? Fear. I will always have it, because it's of human nature, but I will not act upon it any longer. I am saying goodbye to it once and for all.
But after such a horrible tragedy, isn't fear all that's left? Shouldn't I fear for my life every time I leave the house because of all of the horrible attacks that have taken place in the United States in recent years? Shouldn't I avoid large venues and concerts for fear that I might not make it out alive? Shouldn't I change my lifestyle and do everything I can to prevent something like this from happening to me?
No.
No one knows when something bad is going to happen, just like no one knows when something bad is going to happen to them. I can't wake up every day fearing for my life because a devastating, horrifying act like the Las Vegas shooting could literally happen to any of us. Sadly, we live in a dangerous, broken world with a lot of cruel, horrible people, and no one is safe.
Jason Aldean is a famous singer worth millions, and his life was in danger when the shots started going off during his show.
Jake Owen is a rising performer with catchy tunes about being barefoot and going to the beach, and he had to duck for cover as shots were firing off and people were dying.
Ariana Grande has over 100 million followers on Instagram, and she's been nominated for over a dozen awards, including two Grammy's. Her life was in danger when the Manchester bombing attack was carried out on May 22.
Everyone on this planet is at risk every day. Besides the possibility of a mass shooting occurring, you could get hit by a bus, struck by lightning, go into cardiac arrest, or die of a bumble bee sting.
After hearing and reading about a tragedy that I easily could have been a part of, I realize now more than ever how important it is to live your life fearlessly bold and brave every day. You should live it to the fullest and do whatever it is that sets your soul on fire.
In the past, I have acted out of fear.
I changed my major because I didn't think I was capable of going into that career. I stayed in toxic friendships because I didn't think I was worthy of anything better. I stayed in an organization that made me feel miserable because I was afraid of what other people would think of me if I left and I was afraid to leave because I wasn't sure what my life would entail without it.
I have avoided talking to boys and going on dates because I've been afraid of letting people in and saying something stupid or getting my heart broken. I have said no to amazing opportunities because I doubted myself and my capability of doing it successfully. I have given into societal expectations and did what everyone told me to do because I wanted everyone's approval. I have used social media as a tool to hide the true picture of my life, hiding the fact that it's not as perfect as it seems.
I am not living my best life, the happy life I know I deserve, because I have let fear get the best of me.
In the midst of tragedy, I have made it my personal mission to stop living a life of fear. At such a scary time to be living in this broken world, you would think that fear would be the only feeling on my mind, but I won't let it be.
Our lives are in danger every single minute of every single day, and there is absolutely nothing we can do about it. You could be the most cautious person out there, but even you can't prevent every bad thing from possibly happening to you because that's just how life works. Whether you believe in God or fate or unluckiness or the universe or just 'shit happens', it's impossible to control everything.
No matter how hard you try, you're not going to get every single thing your heart desires, and things probably aren't going to work out exactly as you planned, because that's just how life is. Life is hard, and right now it's filled with more sadness and terror than it should be, but we can't do anything to change the past.
We can only continue on and pray that a senseless, horrible act like this never happens again, and do whatever we can to live our best and happiest life. I've heard things like "No one deserves anything."
However, I truly believe that everyone deserves happiness, and if more people were happy and content with their lives, maybe the world wouldn't be such a sad place right now.
So, this is a promise to myself, a promise to be fearless and stop acting on fear and appreciate every new day I am given on earth.
The horrible tragedy that occurred in Las Vegas could have happened to me and it could have happened to any of us, which is more reason to dump the boyfriend you can't stand, quit the job you hate, quit the organization that makes you feel miserable, discard any toxic friendships, and do some soul searching to figure out what sets your soul on fire and makes you happy.
If I've learned anything from the recent events that took place, I have learned that tomorrow is never guaranteed, so I need to do whatever it takes to live my life to the fullest because I deserve to be happy.
So do you.
