At 16 years old when your first love presents himself to you, you feel on top of the world. There is nothing that could tear this love apart, and the days turn into months, and the months turn into years. We were bestfriends, a power couple, and most importantly we had a love that was still burning. As the time went on, we stopped trying to be our best selves for each other, and that was where we made our first mistake. The moment you become complacent and stop actively fighting to keep the love that you shared, you begin to lose it. Our relationship was a true testimony to a love story that just faded, and despite our best efforts... there was nothing we could do to fix it.
So now 6 months later, we are stuck in the never ending loop of hurting one another, and longing for something that just isn't there anymore. I will not allow this to darken my view of love, because when you find the right person, you won't stop fighting for the love you adore. I will not long for someone that I myself am not sure I want to keep in my life as a significant other. I will not long for a love that hurt me beyond comparison, and broke me and brought me to my knees pleading for my pain to be taken away. I will not long for a boy who deserves an endless love that I know I cannot give him.
Moving on was the hardest thing that I had to do, but it was the most rewarding.
As I begin to stand after being on my knees for so long, begging for another chance, please take all of this into consideration..
1. It is not okay to become complacent
Your significant other is worth the fight, they are worth the effort. If you cannot see that worth in that person, let them find someone who will.
2. Do not re-enter their lives periodically, unless your intentions are pure.
Moving on is a process that has to be gradual and it will not come instantly. Spare this person of the pain of trying to pick up broken pieces and having help only when its convenient for you.
I cherish the memories we shared and I am thankful for the relationship we had. You protected me and kept me safe, and I thank you for that. While the love is gone, I still can say that I do not regret giving my heart to you.
I still believe that we had a real love, but unfortunately two years later instead of a burning love that shined bright, we were both fighting with fire.