When I woke up, my eyes were puffy and swollen, and my head pounded as the election results kept hitting me over the head. There was something hanging in the air when I walked through Concordia's campus. I walked into the campus center, and there was near silence. A student stood outside of the dining center asking if people wanted chocolates or a hug. Her intentions were so pure. When I went up and took a Reese's, she told me that people need support today.
We'll need support for the next four years.
I still remember when Obama was elected in 2008. People were ecstatic. A black man had finally become the president of our great nation. Everyone everywhere was saying "Yes we CAN." We all knew that things were finally going to change. And they did.
(It's funny how many Obama haters are now saying they want him to have a third term. Oh, how the tides have changed.)
I was in the Francis Frazier Comstock Theatre when the results started to trickle in. The country was looking a little too red for my comfort... The entire cast of the musical was on their phones throughout the whole show. Who was winning? Why were people still voting for him? Do you really think he's going to be president? We all tried to joke by saying, "How dare they? Holding elections during our tech week, right before the opening night of our musical?!" We were trying to be okay. Backstage was buzzing. Who knows, maybe neither of them will get enough votes. Maybe it'll be up to the electoral college.
It still wasn't looking good around 11 pm. People had said it would be over by now. They said Hillary would sweep the country. Blue all across the board. The estimates showed Trump's chances as small and pathetic. But instead, the fate of our country was up to seven states.
I ate an entire pack of Oreos while I waited. What was America doing? States that had historically been liberal were voting for one of the most conservative candidates America had ever produced.
It's wonderful to know that I live in a country where I am not wanted. For the first time in my life, I'm terrified to be a woman. I'm terrified to be something other than heterosexual. I'm terrified to be an American.
My eyes wept as I tried to figure out how I was going to pass as straight for the next four years. As I thought about conversion therapy. As I thought about all of the back-alley abortions just waiting around the corner. As I thought about the wall he would try to build. This fear turned into anger as I told myself over and over again, "I will never call him President."
There were a lot of young people who chose to not vote in this election. They "knew" Hillary would win. They didn't like any of the candidates. They didn't care. They weren't going to be represented anyway. But why should politicians care about us when we're not actively voting?
I'm still shocked by America. A land of the free and home of the brave will soon be a land of hate and discrimination.
But there is still hope.
Despite all of this, we can still stand together and fight this. It's not going to be easy, but we can handle it. We've lived through war, street violence, discrimination, hatred, misunderstandings, protests, and anarchy. And if we have to, we will do it all over again. The people from America's past didn't die for nothing. We can't let them die for nothing.
Who knows what will happen come Inauguration Day? I'm not even going to guess anymore, because I just don't know. But just because we don't know what will happen doesn't mean we can't still try to make something happen.
Something good.
Something full of love and acceptance and hope.
Through the entirety of this mind-boggling event, there will still be hope. But it's up to us to keep having hope. Hope that women will be okay. Minorities will be okay. We will be okay. America will be okay.