I Will Never Apologize For Loving So Hard | The Odyssey Online
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I Will Never Apologize For Loving So Hard

Because keeping an open heart is the key to happiness.

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I Will Never Apologize For Loving So Hard
Anya Nikolaenko

This year marked something big for me:

I realized what I was worth.

I began reflecting on the people who have come in and out of my life, whether that be friends, family or romantic interests. I realized that I spent the majority of my high school years and even freshman year of college simply letting people walk all over me. I was the girl who would ask everyone to hang out, would text the guy first and stayed up until the early hours of dawn listening to someone's problems. I attached to others so deeply that my entire existence revolved around that person and their happiness. I was so obsessed with having friends and being wanted that I would allow myself to be treated like half of a human.

I connect with people, and I don't like letting go.

I remember caring about men (more like boys) over the past three years who I’m sure couldn't have cared less if I was in their lives. They simply used me over and over again. I remember being best friends with a girl who would look at the mirror every chance she got and drag me around as if I was her assistant. I dedicated four years of my life to the happiness of others when I hardly knew what happiness meant for myself.

This year marked something big for me. I realized what I was worth.

I surround myself with people who genuinely want to see me succeed and don’t want to lose me. However, I will never apologize for loving so hard. I give people second chances. I see the light in those who don’t see it in themselves, and I make sure they know how incredible of a person they are every single day. I fight for people who have done me wrong, even if they have made me cry thousands of times. I don’t apologize for being the emotional person that I am. As much as my heart has been broken, I will never stop fighting for other people and loving with every atom in my body.

I thank every person who has left my life and helped me grow to realize my worth. I won't be replying to your 1 a.m. texts, but I do wish you inner peace, love and happiness.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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