"Let the world know you as you are, not as you think you should be, because sooner or later, if you are posing, you will forget the pose, and then where are you?" -Fanny Brice.
That quote above has been sitting in my Facebook bio for as long as I can remember. It's one of those that you just feel connected to. I spent some time trying to make my friends around me happy, so I spent most of middle school fibbing or gossiping to the wrong person. I used to think that if you heard someone talk badly about someone then it was the right thing to let them know, especially if they knew them. I quickly found out in High School that you don't do that if you want friends.
So here are a few other things I learned over time as well:
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Don't lie. My Mom always said that I wasn't a good liar. I was raised being told that lying was worse then the thing you were lying about. If you weren't being completely honest with someone then you are just wasting your time. Like I said I have lost a few friends because it's just not in my values to be dishonest. I can keep a secret but eventually it just comes out if it's bad enough to damage a relationship. If a secret makes me question that you're even being honest with me as well, then why should I keep it?
It's a struggle to be a nice person and an honest person at the same time.
Don't let people change you.Over time I have met a lot of people I thought were my friends that made me sacrifice these values. It's crazy how many people actually live their lives so dishonestly that they can justify those actions. People who would rather not deal and compromise on what they really want than have a small fight. People who cheat and lie to everyone around them but say things like "well it's because they did this". Since when did doing something bad become okay if someone else is bad as well?
Friends will come in go. You will not see half the people you spent High School with. If they treat you bad then why are they important? If they don't like or agree with your decisions then you either care or don't. It's honestly none of their business unless you want it to be. Everyone around you right now won't be there in 10 years.
When thinking about your values and morals, don't consider what other people think about you. It really doesn't matter what anyone thinks. If someone has that much power over you and can impact your decisions then you don't really have a mind of your own anymore. Never lose your own sense of wonder.
“Your time is way too valuable to be wasting on people that can't accept who you are.”
― Turcois Ominek
