Every single day I come across a new person, a new coffee shop, a new record, a new band, or a new essay that is assigned and due the next day. College is a vastly different community than high school. The first semester rushes towards you faster than a Chrysler Town and Country full of kids who are late for school that’s driven by an unnecessarily stressed out mom.

My first week consisted of countless pages of chemistry, a paper, and a group project, let alone trying to adjust to an entire new city and state. I thought that I knew exactly who I was and what I believed before I stepped foot into college, but I was wrong. The first few days of having complete freedom from the tyranny of parents was simply amazing. I could stay up as late as I wanted to, I could go wherever I wanted without asking, and I could hang out with whoever, whenever. After the first week of freedom, I started to notice how different I was from the “cool” guy who walked across that stage and received a piece of paper that said I successfully suffered through 13 years of the public education system. Still, more than halfway through the semester, I am morphing and changing and figuring out new things about myself every single day. You may be wondering “Ryan, where in the world are you going with this?”, and if you are, good, because now I am going to lay it down for you (no, I am not going to rap). What I am trying to say is: since I am changing so much every day, I think I can safely assume that every single person that is doing life as a college freshman with me is changing as well.

Since we are all changing and morphing so much in the first semester, I have made the decision to not be in a relationship my first semester. You may be thinking: “Ryan, this boy/girl is so amazing, I know they won’t change. We instantly clicked and they make me so happy”. But what I am saying, is that is simply foolish. I would like to bet the slim amount of money in my checking account that you have changed so much since you have been at college. The things you love, your pet peeves, your favorite song, your style, the way you write, how much you sleep. It has all changed. I will even go further and bet that your personality has changed to, and if yours has, this love of your life’s has changed as well, and probably will change again. All this change creates a toxic dating atmosphere. Yeah, I know we live in a culture that belittles singles, but hear me out. Take time for yourself, figure out who you are first, and let that girl/guy who you instantly fell for figure themselves out. What you think is the perfect guy/girl now, may completely change after Thanksgiving break. With excessive amounts of school work, it is not necessary to have the extra burden of a failed first semester relationship on your heart.

I know some of you won’t listen to me, and that is totally fine. Everybody is different, but don’t be upset when you guys break up and think “wow, that Ryan guy was right”, yeah I know I am. Focus on making friends this semester, because you are going to need them later when you do have a break up. Friends are an essential part of life, and if the primary motive for your relationships with people are strictly romantic, then you definitely should re-evaluate your thought process.

Regardless, whatever you do, just enjoy your first semester and make the most out of it. Ask friends to hang out, go to the dollar theater, eat ramen and watch Netflix, just have fun. College is supposed to be the best years of your life, so what are you doing about it? Go out and do something!