Why You Should Never Settle For Less Than What You Deserve In A Relationship | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Relationships

Why You Should Never Settle For Less Than What You Deserve In A Relationship

You should never settle for anything less than your expectations.

130
Why You Should Never Settle For Less Than What You Deserve In A Relationship

I have been told by many that I set my standards "too high" for a partner to be able to meet while I am "in college" and should be "dating for fun". To me, the purpose of dating is to learn what you would like and dislike in a life partner; however, I already have a solid amount of expectations from my future partner, as well as myself. While I do not have everything figured out to a T, I know that I will not until I meet the person who does fit in a relationship with me well.

I believe that no one has the right to tell you what your standards should be. Set them as high as you would like, because while every individual you may find attractive may not meet those standards, you will be thankful for the day that you find one, or more, of those individuals that do- and I guarantee that you will.

Here are a few of the reasons why I believe that you should not "settle".

Often, expectations are values based; therefore, if you choose to invest time in someone whose core values differ from your own, you may run into serious conflicts.

I for one demand respect from a partner before all else, as one of my core values is to treat yourself and others with kindness and respect. It is so important to know that what your mind tells you matters alongside your eyes and heart are saying.

However attractive you may find an individual, it does not mean that they are the right person for you.

Why? Physical attraction is not all that matters in a relationship. Of course, it may seem like an important factor in the brink of a relationship, or 'talking'; however, long term relationships require more. I like to think of certain traits as a wish list. Yet, what I find to matter most is the non-negotiable traits. There is a list of 'needs' I have in my mind that I would like to find in a partner. While it isn't exactly short, it is general and reasonable:

- They are kind to others

- They are honest, trustworthy, and faithful to me and their loved ones

- They must have ambition about their goals in life: have passion about the path they see themself on

- They must have effective communication, or constantly work to have it

- They must be willing to compromise and understand that a relationship should be equal and fair

- They must bring positive energy, and be open about when they are having a hard time remaining positive through hardships

- They must have their own life with their own interests, and understand that I have mine as well

- They must be someone I feel that I am safe with

- They must be seeking employment in their future, or studying to pursue a degree for their future career

Once these needs have been met for myself, then I allow myself to evaluate my wish list, and how they fit into my extra interests that are not a 'must have', but would be nice.

Understand that if you are in a relationship that does not meet your standards or your partners, it is okay to walk away.

I have the mindset that dating is a trial and error process until you find someone that you are most compatible with to spend your life with. While it may be unpleasant to think about break ups, it is all part of the process. It may be painful, but with love, you have to take that risk. So, understand going into a relationship that it may not be your last, and know that it is okay.

If you hold yourself to a certain standard, it is only fair you hold a set of standards you expect from a partner as well. Would you settle for less from yourself? If not, then why would you choose to settle for less from someone you may spend the rest of your life with?

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
ross geller
YouTube

As college students, we are all familiar with the horror show that is course registration week. Whether you are an incoming freshman or selecting classes for your last semester, I am certain that you can relate to how traumatic this can be.

1. When course schedules are released and you have a conflict between two required classes.

Bonus points if it is more than two.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

12 Things I Learned my Freshmen Year of College

When your capability of "adulting" is put to the test

3028
friends

Whether you're commuting or dorming, your first year of college is a huge adjustment. The transition from living with parents to being on my own was an experience I couldn't have even imagined- both a good and a bad thing. Here's a personal archive of a few of the things I learned after going away for the first time.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

Economic Benefits of Higher Wages

Nobody deserves to be living in poverty.

302091
Illistrated image of people crowded with banners to support a cause
StableDiffusion

Raising the minimum wage to a livable wage would not only benefit workers and their families, it would also have positive impacts on the economy and society. Studies have shown that by increasing the minimum wage, poverty and inequality can be reduced by enabling workers to meet their basic needs and reducing income disparities.

I come from a low-income family. A family, like many others in the United States, which has lived paycheck to paycheck. My family and other families in my community have been trying to make ends meet by living on the minimum wage. We are proof that it doesn't work.

Keep Reading...Show less
blank paper
Allena Tapia

As an English Major in college, I have a lot of writing and especially creative writing pieces that I work on throughout the semester and sometimes, I'll find it hard to get the motivation to type a few pages and the thought process that goes behind it. These are eleven thoughts that I have as a writer while writing my stories.

Keep Reading...Show less
April Ludgate

Every college student knows and understands the struggle of forcing themselves to continue to care about school. Between the piles of homework, the hours of studying and the painfully long lectures, the desire to dropout is something that is constantly weighing on each and every one of us, but the glimmer of hope at the end of the tunnel helps to keep us motivated. While we are somehow managing to stay enrolled and (semi) alert, that does not mean that our inner-demons aren't telling us otherwise, and who is better to explain inner-demons than the beloved April Ludgate herself? Because of her dark-spirit and lack of filter, April has successfully been able to describe the emotional roller-coaster that is college on at least 13 different occasions and here they are.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments