Most relationships in today's society (not all) focus on either 1) hooking up or 2) keeping their distance from one another, making sure not to get too intimate with one another. People, nowadays, are more concerned with how many people they can sleep with rather than how committed they can stay to another person. I also live in a generation where technology is very relevant, and at times and in some people, can consume our/their lives. This being said, many people "talk" to people via text message or social media accounts such as snapchat, twitter, or instagram through dms and likes, but they keep it at just that. "Talking". They never (usually) ask that person out on a date to go see a movie or out go dinner or whatever. It simply stays at communicating through each other behind a screen, and I believe that a lot of this has to do with people's fears of becoming so close to one another. "Talking" behind a screen allows us to keep distance from one another while still obtaining the desired things: affection, attention, self esteem boost, a companion, but only to a certain extent. You could also argue that both of these aspects can be combined, and a great example of this is sexting. So why should society stop these things? Why should we stop these? Why should we fully get to know a person? And not "knowing" them-- their interests, their personality traits, their favorite foods, etc.-- but getting to know their mind-- their secrets, their flaws, their thought process, etc.

Note: These ideas do not just apply to romantic relationships but all sorts of relationships (friends and families).

1. It allows you to know their negative qualities and if you can accept these.

There is a lot a person can hide behind a phone screen. There is also a lot a person can hide within themselves. If you never get to know a person's thought process or if you never dig inside to that person's mind, you'll never discover the flaws they have. Texting (like most social media profiles we see) allows the person to shape themselves into the person they wish to present themselves as. They can hide the fact that they have an addiction they don't want you to know about, or they can hide the fact that they have some anger problems because a phone screen does not show those qualities of a person, and it allows that person to present themselves in the way they want to. As for in person, if you never ask them questions that may strike a nerve and if you keep your conversations to simple small talk, those negative qualities most likely will not be revealed to you either. It'd be simply like both of you guys beating around the bush for an extended amount of time. However, asking them questions that require them to open up a little bit will expose them more and more, little by little. It takes a great deal of time to truly get to know someone, so of course, you are not going to learn every single flaw of theirs in a month or two. Learning about their negative qualities will allow you to learn how to deal with them, and it will also give you an idea of how you can help them improve.

2. It gives you insight into how they view the world.

I think this point can be best explained by stating this: I believe that people enjoy plays, books, movies, music, dance, poems, etc. so much because it allows you inside that creative person's mind. It gives you a chance to look inside someone else's mind and escape your own. It gives you an idea on how they perceive the world, what they think is wrong with the world, what story lies behind the person, and it might or might not be relatable to you or your own opinions, but either way, it gives you new knowledge that shapes your views and educates your mind on certain ideas you may not have picked up on your own. Let this sink in for a minute... This aspect applies to relationships, too. There is no better way to getting to know a person than having long, deep conversations about the ways of the world and the complications of life. These serious talks are often what draw a connection between people, too. Have you ever met two people who are close to each other simply by small talk, never discussing why the world works the way it works? Never discussing together the important issues of life?

3. You'll grow closer together. Connected, but not to the point where, "I am Heathcliff," is the statement of your relationship.
Yes, I just threw shade at Catherine and Heathcliff's relationship for anybody who has read Wuthering Heights. If you don't know what I mean by that, then it should (hopefully) make sense soon.

Now we touch at that people's fear of intimacy and dependence. Many people today tend to want to keep their distance from people, especially romantically. They want to deal with all their issues on their own, and they do not want to have to worry about someone hurting them in the future. All of this is completely understandable. Trust me, I'm sure we all have been there at one point or another. I'm only 17, and I already have felt that. It's a pretty common thing-- trust issues. But, we cannot handle everything on our own. We will eventually have to lean on someone else to hold us up, and that is completely okay. My best advice in order to prevent pain in the future (which is nearly inevitable, but it doesn't hurt to try and achieve) is to surround yourself with good people. Cut the toxic people out of your life. But the reality of the matter is that we are human, and we may act all strong and independence, but we all have our limits, and when those limits are reached, we need a reliable person to go to. By falling in love with a person's mind, you create this connection between the other person which makes it easier for you to go to them when life gets difficult, and vise versa. You know you can fully trust them, and you know they genuinely care for you. However, you should still be able to depend on yourself, help yourself, care for yourself, and dig yourself out of whatever grave you are in. People can help you climb out of the grave by reaching for your arms or putting down a ladder, but they can't put the dirt back in the ground for you. They can't be your ground. You have to be your own ground for yourself. The only person who can do it is you. Again, we should ask for help when we need it, but we should not completely rely on one person alone to solve all of our problems.

4. You'll experience unconditional love.

Because you have gotten to know this person's mind, and because they most likely did the same with you (being that it's typically a two-way street), you'll love this person no matter what, and they will love you no matter what. You will genuinely care for one another and want what is best for one another. I can't explain why this happens. I don't know why we love some people unconditionally despite their flaws, but it happens. I'm not complaining, though, because it is a great thing. However, the only person who knows every single detail about your mind and who knows every thought that pops into your brain is God (in my case, at least. You believe what you believe. You do you, man). God loves us no matter what awful things go through our brains and what awful things we do, and I believe He is the only person who can fully love us unconditionally because He is the only person to know every single thing about us. That being said, I think that falling in love with someone's mind and letting them love yours is closest thing we get to the unconditional love we get from God.