You know the saying, "Don't cross oceans for people who wouldn't cross puddles for you." Yeah.. well, I don't believe that. I've read many comments on this quote and many stories as to why this is such a bad thing, but how could doing something nice for someone and showing them care be so bad? Why does it have such a negative connotation? I've been asking myself that recently and heard the opinions of my friends, but I still don't believe that it should be something to be frowned upon.
I've always been told to have compassion for people and to always treat them the way you would want to be treated. For me, I want to be treated with respect and kindness. As I'm sure most people do. I'm also sure most people want support from their friends and acquaintances. I've also been told that the people who hurt you the most are the ones who are hurting. I have come to find that very true.
It's an unfortunate day when someone treats you poorly. And it's certainly poor when they even make you cry. I know it seems so much easier to curse their name and think bad thoughts about them, but it's not. Despite how good it feels. But ask yourself this: Is it really going to make me feel better in the long run? I can tell first hand that it doesn't, not even a little bit. When we hold on to that anger for too long, we hold grudges and it is continuously on our minds. You're not solving the problem; you're making it harder. Whether it's an ex, a friend, or someone you meet in the grocery store, love the unlovable.
Why should you do that? Be the person who brightens their day. Who shows them compassion and positivity. But don't do it out of pity or personal gain. Yes, you'll earn some good Karma points, but that's not the point. Give them compliments and tell them something positive. Not only will the recipient gain something positive, but so will you. Loving the unlovable isn't always easy. They tend to turn their backs on you or want to walk away, but don't let them. At least not yet. Sometimes they will stay and people will tell you to let them go but again, not just yet. If you really do feel like it is best to let them fly off, then let them, but not before your time is up. We are put into each other's lives for a reason. It may be as small as someone you talk to in line at a grocery store or as big as someone saving your life. The unlovable and the lovable are put together for one purpose, to teach each other a lesson and possibly build a friendship. Those kinds of relationships should be cherished and appreciated. They're certainly not the easiest, but they are the most rewarding. God believed that you could be a light into someone's soul. Don't take that for granted and don't let the unlovable do so either. But understand that they already feel like the world has turned against them, so do what you can to show them the truth.
As far as crossing oceans for people, do it. Show them that someone can actually care about them and not do it selfishly. Love them and love all people, because you are stronger than they are and you know that you'll be OK. If they feel unworthy, convince them otherwise. Don't think about what you're gaining; think about what you're giving. Don't feel like you're giving too much because you'll know when to stop, and don't let them take advantage of you but do what you can and with all your heart.
"God teaches us to love by putting some unlovely people around us. It takes no character to love people who are lovely and loving to you." -- Rick Warren.
"If you are willing to look at another person's behavior toward you as a reflection of the state of their relationship with themselves rather than a statement about your value as a person, then you will, over a period of time, cease to react at all." -- Yogi Bhajan
