Why You Have to Stop Looking | The Odyssey Online
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Why You Have to Stop Looking

The right guy will come when you least expect it...

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Why You Have to Stop Looking
Amber Niedermaier

I'll admit that I haven't had the greatest luck with relationships, many of them were one-sided either on my end or theirs. I was like every other girl thinking that all guys are jerks and the only good ones are either taken, have friendzoned you a long time ago, or playing for the same team. I would try to force relationships to work just because I wanted to be in a relationship and was tired of being single while my friends began pairing off, but that just led to a lot more problems and more reasons for me to swear off guys forever.

My mom would always say to me "the guy you are looking for will show up when you least expect it. You have to stop looking in order for it to happen." In all honesty, I thought she was crazy. If I stopped looking, how would I know that he's the one I'm looking for? I couldn't help but think as I was talking to a potential fling "is he the one my mom is talking about?" The answer was always unanimously no.

I was close to swearing off dating forever after my work and school schedule slowly began dominating my life...until an old friend changed their profile picture...and I soon figured out that my mom was right.

I didn't expect to start dating again, let alone find someone who liked me back (I have a permanent residence in the friendzone with most males), but somehow someway my lovely boyfriend crashed into my life and I wouldn't want it any other way.

So to all those girls out there thinking that love is a lie and that you're going to be a single crazy cat lady when you're 40, don't lose hope. First of all, cats make great companions and second, the right guy always comes around eventually. Yeah, you might have to kiss a few frogs (or toads depending on how well they treat you), but happiness is always just around the corner. I didn't believe it at first either. I'm used to guys leaving and losing interest about a month in to the relationship, so I was in the same boat as you not too long ago and I thought for the longest time that my boat was sinking.

It's okay not to be in a relationship. Having a guy or gal in your life is great, yes, but it's also okay to live your life and be happy being single. There's nothing wrong with being single, ever. Happiness does not come from other people. If you spend your life trying to find happiness in others, you're going to end up losing yourself.

So stop looking, enjoy life. Hang out with friends you haven't seen in years. Flirt with that cute barista at Starbucks with no strings attached. You don't have to start a relationship with anyone who shows interest in you if you don't want to. Make yourself happy first and the rest will follow. That guy is out there, you just have to focus on your life first.


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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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