Okay, look... I know you were probably told the "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" line about three million times (trust me, I've been there and heard that), but the funny thing is, this stupid cliché saying is actually true.
Every day, life throws us into hard decisions, terrible situations, and uncomfortable conversations. Every day, life gives us new obstacles to climb and (probably) trip over, where it be rejection, pain, depression, anxiety, illness, hurt in those around you, loneliness, and more, and even more. Yet, every day you experience one (or maybe all) of these things, you learn to adapt and be bold in supporting yourself.
You do have the power to support yourself through these things, and you have already come so far. Take a deep breath and recognize the strength you have and the abilities you have because of your perseverance. You are so strong.
All of the serious life lessons you learned did not happen when the sun was out and butterflies surrounded you while you sang to all the little critters in the forest. The things that made you who you arehad you stuck in a mud pit, screaming to get out, or in a pitch black room with nothing but silence.
The things that once scared you, the things still scaring you, the things making you cry just thinking about them, and the things making you feel ashamed or hurt: these are the real life parts of you. They demonstrate all of the struggle you surpassed (successfully).
I know I sometimes look at all of the things I go through and make jokes about how I'm "unsure" if I'll make it through, but you know what's funny? Even through some of the hardest things in my whole life, I made it - I survived. And now, I have really tough, nitty and gritty stories that all add up to me.
Through all the negative things that weighed and do weigh me down, I am now a much more optimistic and positive person (most of the time). There are so many good things coming from these awfully painful things in our lives that they almost outweigh the bad.
Don't get me wrong... Good times and good things happening in your life are oh so very valuable, and hard things are no joke. However, you shouldn't let the bad things define you. Instead, let the strength and strides you made, because of the bad things, grow you further into how you want to define yourself.
I sometimes wish people posted real things about their lives on social media and not just selfies with pained smiles never really showing the things in those people's hearts. I know I'm guilty of this (that's for sure), but I know this wouldn't be a realistic expectation, and that's okay. It's much better getting to know these life-defining moments in people.
And hey, I hear ya. Winter is tough.
The sky is dark more than it's light, and the cold makes you stay inside and avoid people. I get it, but the spring comes so, so soon, and it will be here before you know it. Just know there are so many people out there for you. So many people want to protect you from all that hurts. So many people want to know how you are really doing and not just the automatic "I'm good" response.
Gardens don't grow without rain. You would not be who you are without the emotional and physical scars you acquired over the years.
As I wrote this, I heard these lyrics from a song, "I get so broken, I forget to breathe," and I don't think I heard something so accurate in a long time. So recognize when you hold your breath. You can handle this. Ride the wave out, and remember to give yourself a break.