Spending three years in college has given me a lot of time to reflect on my high school experience. One of the things my friends and I agree on is that if we could go back in time, we would not have dated anyone during our high school career and these are the top 4 reasons why:
1. 90% of high school relationships don't last.
When we were in high school, we always said that our relationships would last forever. Everyone was hoping that they would be high school sweethearts and be like the love stories in the movies. In reality, no one was kissing in the rain, and if the relationship did last post graduation the majority never got past freshman year of college. One's high school career has a start and finish, and realistically so do most high school relationships. So why not spend that time without drama and arguing and spend it with making more memories with your friends? High school friendships last longer than the relationships themselves. Plus the average high schooler is making minimum wage and has very little money. That money can be spent on yourself instead of a short term boyfriend, and it'll be a better investment.
2. You are still trying to find yourself.
When you are in high school you are still trying to find yourself. You aren't sure what your identity is and most of your concern is wanting to feel accepted and liked by others. When you then add juggling a relationship it can quickly get complicated and prolong you finding yourself as an individual and not always as someone in a relationship. This can make it harder for some to accept the single life once they are in college because they are so used to be in a relationship.
3. Everyone is consumed with the concept of love but not understanding what it really means to be in love.
In high school you think you know what love really is, but in reality, you don't know at all. High school is when your definition of love actually evolves.
4. Most if not all of the people you dated in high school will be people you wish you never dated.
Many of the people that you have dated in high school you wish that you had never dated because many times you date people just because you want to be in a relationship. In high school, you are starting to develop your standards when it comes to relationships so you settle many times for those that you wouldn't normally date, and realistically when you look back you won't even know what you saw in them anyway.
The lessons you take from those relationships are life changing, but if I could go back and tell my high school self one thing I would tell myself to not bother with relationships and I'll enjoy my high school experience even more. There is so much time to date in college and afterwards—when you have your own identity, understand what love is and have real standards.
