I'm in bed trying to sleep. I'm trying to forget about the long day ahead of me tomorrow, but my heart starts beating so hard and fast that I can't close my eyes. Suddenly I feel my whole body become warm under the blankets and I feel like I have flu symptoms. The world feels like it's closing in around me.
I didn't ask for anxious thoughts. I didn't ask to worry about everything. But I do.
You can't find one single person that has never worried about a thing before. When we forget about an assignment due at midnight? Worry. When we think we said the wrong thing or gave the wrong impression? Worry. We don't know what our future holds? Worry. Sometimes, it's almost as if you aren't fitting in if you're not worried about something. It's almost as if our daily lives invite us to worry through every situation and thought that we have.We sink our teeth into doubt and dwell on it until it eats us. So why do we do it?
1. Doubt
We don't think it'll ever happen, or we have no drive to see that it's done. We doubt our capabilities and gifts.
2. Insecurity
We worry about what people think about us. Constantly. We worry that we're not doing as well as everyone around us, so we worry about being the 'lesser' one.
3. Time Management
I think my biggest worrier is time management. We allot time for the things that we care about, and sometimes we care about not doing anything or doing the wrong things.
4. Self-Focus
We only look inwardly at our flaws and shortcomings, but we don't consider other people. We hyper-focus on our issues and close them up tight inside of us, causing us to not only worry, but to worry alone.
Worrying conquers ambition, dreams, productivity, and relationships. It cripples and destroys, but we don't see how detrimental it can be to our lives. I think there are different things to consider when we think about worrying. For someone who finds themselves in a situation where worrying is understandable, that's different for the constant worriers.
But worrying was never meant to be a part of us. It was never supposed to rule our lives and distract us from the purpose we have in Christ.
If we separate ourselves from God, we separate ourselves from purpose. Worrying is a perfect distraction from God because it takes our focus off of his sovereignty, peace, and love.
We were not created to have our heads down in our own lives, suffocating with anxiety. We were made to dwell in God's peace. Every single moment. Every single thought.
Best,
Hope