Feminism. A word that strikes fear into the heart of every misogynist, men and women alike.

Over these past few months, I’ve seen several writers claim they will never be a “modern-day feminist.” And I get your point, I do. It feels as if now more than ever there are extremists from every group, from democrats and republicans, and even feminists. Women who entirely disown all men, claim that the entire gender consists of misogynists and rapists.

The movement, for these women, is no longer about equality. It is about hate, hate for the opposite sex and hate for those who do not agree with them. They strive for control over all things, and wish to crush anyone (read: any man) in their path.

But it doesn't have to be like this.

Being a feminist in the current state of political affairs doesn’t have to mean you’re one of those women who hates all men. Calling yourself a feminist shouldn’t mean you condemn yourself to a label of “crazy.” I believe it’s possible to be a feminist without harboring the agenda of what many call a “modern-day feminist.”

There will always be extremists in every social or political group. But that shouldn’t set the tone for the entire movement. I can still call myself a feminist, and, more importantly, I can decide what that means to me. I don’t hate all men. I don’t think every boy will grow up to become a rapist, or that every man is inherently evil. I strive for equality, not control. In fact, there are countless women like me, who identify as feminists and want nothing more than equal rights and respect.

And you can, too. Is this what has happened to feminism? A movement that gave us our right to vote and lobbies for equality in the workplace is now viewed as a hate-filled campaign?

The argument over what exactly a feminist stands for isn’t new. There are, and always have been, different types of feminism. From radical to libertarian, the word “feminist” itself doesn’t have to define what you stand for. Choose a label that supports your ideas and don’t give up on an entire campaign.

Some so-called “feminists” have lost sight of what we as women are really fighting for. That doesn’t mean we all have. What I strive for is simple. Equality, both in the workplace and in politics. To recognize and embrace the differences between men and women.

Respect, in public and private alike. In the end, what do we as equal rights advocates have to do to reclaim feminism as a movement? What do those of us who are still here have to accomplish to get others to realize the heroes far outweigh the villains?

This is for the women and men who want to be a feminist but don’t want to associate themselves with a movement that degrades others. We still exist. We don’t have to let a select few define us. Decide for yourself what feminism means to you.