I recently went to a wedding, so it's no surprise weddings have been on my mind lately. I have nothing against weddings, but I find them to be a rather boring formality.
I haven't actually been to many of them. I was part of two; the first when I was around four or five as a flower girl for one of my cousins, and the second when I was 13 years old as a junior bridesmaid for my older sister. I attended one a couple years ago and another about a year ago. I attended two more in the past month. Alright, maybe I've been to more than I thought. Weddings can be nice because it is a wonderful celebration, so people are happy that the married couple is happy, but weddings themselves are really boring.
Honestly, if you've been to one wedding, you've been to them all.
There are cheesy lines written near the guestbook sign in. There's probably a sign that says "Pick a Seat, Not a Side" in cutesy handwriting by the seating for the ceremony (even though everyone is going to "pick a side" anyway because we all gravitate to familiar faces so there really wasn't a point in making the sign).
There's decorations down the aisle right by the feet of the people sitting by the aisle that will be broken by the end of the ceremony if it's breakable. There's always something to symbolize the two families being brought together as one, whether it's lighting candles, throwing soil in a pot, mixing together glass beads in a vase, or tying ribbon together.
Then there's the reception.
When the bridal party comes waltzing in, the music that's playing is probably something similar to what's played when high school basketball teams are rushing out as the announcers call out the starting lineup. The speeches made typically make a few jabs at the newlyweds, but overall they all basically say the same thing: "When I saw [name of spouse] with [name of spouse], I knew there was something different about this one" and that "they're a perfect fit for each other."
The dinners are also overly fancy as if the newlyweds are trying to prove something by it. I don't care if dinner is decorated with edible flowers and has an unpronounceable name Barbara, just give me a plate of spaghetti and I'll be fine. The playlist for a wedding reception is pretty much the same for any high school dance only with a lot more songs that include "will you marry me" or "I do" or anything at all related to marriage, love, and lifelong happiness.
And, of course, it's not really a party until Cupid Shuffle plays.
Weddings have been traditional anyway, so it's really not much of a surprise that they've all started to blur together and become predictable and boring despite people's attempts to make them unique. At the last one I went to, I physically had to bite my tongue because I was keeping myself entertained (and awake) by muttering snarky comments to my mother sitting next to me (who did not appreciate my sass).
So why the hell do I keep going?
The answer is pretty simple when I think about it: the people. The only weddings I've really been in attendance for were all for people that I had known most of or the entirety of my life. They were for people that, whether or not I like to admit it sometimes, meant something.
No matter how awkward or out of place I may have possibly felt at a few of them, I almost always felt infinitely better after greeting the newlyweds and seeing how happy they were that the day they'd been waiting however long for had finally arrived and their friends and family were present to celebrate with them.
While I don't necessarily enjoy attending weddings, I do enjoy seeing my family and friends happy. And, I guess, if sitting through a boring ceremony and enduring a standard predictable reception is what it takes to help make them happy on their special day, I can put aside my personal feelings about weddings. Which is good, because I have at least another two weddings to attend in 2018.
I know after reading all this that it may sound like I despise weddings and witnessing the union between individuals, but that's just because I'm a bit of a cynic. When it comes to my friends and family, I will readily sit in an uncomfortable seat shoulder to shoulder with the people on either side of me for the duration of the ceremony and then make awkward small talk at the reception with people I haven't seen in five or ten years. Just because I'm a bit (a lot) bored doesn't mean I'm not still happy for the newlyweds.
I wish all the best to my family and friends who've gotten married over the years or are going to be in the future, and I hope that they get everything out of marriage that they hoped for.