- Denial
- Anger
- Bargaining
- Depression
- Acceptance
These are the five stages of grief or bereavement in the world of psychology. It’s normal to go through these stages, and it’s typically a major coping strategy for therapists and grief counselors alike. On occasion, people may only experience four, when they bypass depression. However, as of late people have been adding a sixth stage:
- Politicizing
Politicizing after a tragic event happens rarely, but when it does happen, it’s nationwide. This is because mass shootings almost always result in this extra stage of grief.
This topic came up recently when I was out to brunch with some friends from high school. We talked about how horrifying it was to wake up to something so sad, and how painful it would be to not know if your dearest friends or family were alive. And then we talked about how mass shootings such as these always end up with a political cloud that hovers over America while the families of the wounded and deceased are left to pick up the pieces.
"Are guns the problem?!"
"Are Muslims the problem?!"
I don't want to hear it.
Now is not the time.
I am not here to tell you what to believe about firearms. I am not here to tell you what to believe about Islam. And I am not here to berate those who have already fit the recent Orlando shooting into their agendas. But I am here to ask everyone to let it be. Put the agendas aside for one moment and let people grieve.
When you experience the loss of a loved one, you don’t want people to exploit their death for personal gain. You need to be comforted and supported during that time of grief. This is no different than how you should treat those who suffered from the Orlando shooting, where actual people, not political pawns, were senselessly murdered for evil reasons.
This is no different than the mass shootings before Orlando, and it will be no different after. Honor these beautiful people like they mean so much more than the political arguments you get into at work or on Facebook.
Trust me, I love more than anything to watch a political debate on topics such as gun control unfold. And I’m not saying that bringing up mass shootings to challenge a point in a debate is uncalled for.
I’m saying that we should save it for later. Put it aside and be there for others. Be compassionate and be comfort to those with hurting hearts in Orlando. Be a light in this dark, dark world. And please, stop politicizing tragedies so instantly.
