Many times, I have found myself in conversations that led to people talking about things that by one means or another put down others. When we talk about our lives, the people in our lives, school and the events we go through, it's hard to keep in mind that these things actually not only happen to us, but others as well. I have realized that this is common, yet really detrimental:
"My roommate is such a lazy person, he has a 2.4 GPA. He should just become a business major."
There are so many things wrong with that sentence. For some reason, we see things the way they are portrayed and never try to look deeper to see if there could be a reason why that is the case. I have noticed that when I talked to these people, I started scrutinizing my own morals and values. Am I someone who judges people by what they portray? So I decided to question why some things might be the way they are, rather than simply passing judgment on it and acting like a know-it-all. I discovered that usually, there is a reason as to why people are the way they are. When I realized that a conversation led to prompted somebody deprecating even if it's unintentional, I asked them questions instead of agreeing.
"Well, why do you think your roommate has a 2.4? Maybe he's going through something. I think you should be worried for him instead of being harsh and try to talk to him."
Now, I'm not saying that individuals who judge others are essentially terrible individuals--it's how society is assembled. We're born, we're raised, and once we interact with people, we think that what they're doing is right and we adapt to it and repeat. What's vital, nonetheless, is to go to the acknowledgment that there's a greater picture. In a psychology class I took once, there was a small iceberg on top of the water that was actually a huge ice block underneath. Whenever I find myself in these types of situations, I always think of that iceberg. Yes, the ice looks small but underneath it, there's so much more to it that is not perceivable to the eye.
It's really hard to empathize in a world that is filled with cruel people; it's really easy to hate, and it's really easy to judge others because somehow, it makes us more comfortable. We feel better about ourselves. But please understand that the individual you're judging may have been you before, or could be in future. It is important to ask ourselves: "Would I want to be treated the same way?" In a day that's cloudy, we can easily be someone's ray of sunshine.
