I always try to stay away from the news and current events because everything is so depressing. But recently, all the hatred in the world is bursting my self-induced bubble. More so than usual, I find myself being pelted by bad, horrific news left and right, and it's overwhelming. There are people in this world suffering, and there are people fighting those who are suffering.
There's gun violence and domestic violence. If I listed all the types of violence, I would be here for a long time. I know throughout history there's been war, death, and destruction, so it might seem silly to feel so cornered about the current state of the world. But as a conscientious twenty-one-year old, I'm drowning in its pain. Why is there so much hatred between human beings? What do we ever really get from fighting and hating each other? There is no human connectedness or faith in humanity anymore. There is only me versus you; only me versus the world.
We all bear an overpowering sense of loneliness. Whether you're graduating college, working a steady job, or living with a huge family, there are always times when we feel alone and we don't know why. It's not always at the forefront of my thoughts, but with each little piece of bad news, each setback, each weird interaction I have with a person, I feel more and more isolated. Despite any accomplishments and any good things that happen to me, there is always something bad that makes me feel like all my efforts are a little worthless. I hate that feeling, and I want it to stop. I think the only way to combat it is to start talking about love.
About a week ago, I attended a service for lessons and carols about Christmas, but I had no idea it was a service. I just thought it was a Christmas concert, so my heart, which was already feeling a little bit of the weight of the world, was not ready for the fulfilling experience it was. I sat in the upper-floor seating of a great big hall and looked down upon the ceremony. There were three choirs, an orchestra, and poinsettias filling the stage. The room was dark except for a couple spot lights and a few strings of Christmas lights that lined the wall behind the stage. I was wary of the service, simply because I'm not a particularly religious person, but I was enthralled. The speakers spoke of patience, virtue, kindness and generosity. And then there was music. Various forms of hallelujahs were sung, but there was one version in particular that hasn't left my mind since. The choir in the middle of the stage rose from their seats and began to sing this soft, almost eerie but still beautiful, version of the song. They all moved together, their body's swaying together like a heartbeat that followed the rhythm of the word hallelujah. From that moment on, I cried throughout the rest of the service. The woman who spoke at the end spoke of love. She said in light of so much tragedy in the world, love is the only constant thing we have that can combat that darkness. We should center love in our daily lives if we want to bring peace to our world.
People spend so much time focused on the bad parts of the world that I think it's become easy for them to forget about love. I give compliments to my friends, and they are visibly uncomfortable. I tell someone I think they're beautiful, and they laugh and tell me to stop it. And it's not because they don't love me back. It has become hard for us to believe that we can be loved. It has become hard for us to say we love in return.
The service made me realize that I don't have enough love in my life. We don't tell our mothers and fathers that we love them enough. We don't tell our friends that they make us who we are and that we cherish them every day. One might argue that this is unnecessary because having a relationship with them is enough to let them know we care. But I think that's wrong. We can't be ambiguous with love. We need to start talking about it so people realize that despite the darkness in the world, there is something to hold onto. There will always be uncertainties and tragedies, but we can't let them take over our lives. Remind your loved ones how much you care about them. Be kind to someone you don't know. Love yourself. Let yourself be loved by others. We have to be explicit with our love, so we can be reminded that there is good in the world and that we matter.
