Why Walmart Is Low-Key The Bomb | The Odyssey Online
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Why Walmart Is Low-Key The Bomb

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Why Walmart Is Low-Key The Bomb
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Where I’m from, going to “The Walmart” is big deal. For a long while, my tiny town had only a small Crossroads Market, filled with chips, bread and overpriced milk. (A Dollar General has since opened in its place, and we are forever grateful. Long live the DG.)

As a kid, Walmart outings were awful, long, and boring. It took 30 minutes to get there, and these trips lasted for a literal ten years. The groceries filled up the cart (forcing me to get out and walk), and they left me Go-Gurt-less and disappointed. (Apparently I always let Go-Gurt go to waste. Whatever, Mom.)

However, when I moved to college -- a mere eight minutes from a Walmart -- I discovered how magical that place truly is. Walmart is actually low-key the bomb and deserves more credit.

First of all, it’s open 24 hours a day.

Anything that is open for 24 hours is automatically magical for a college student, who craves a doughnut, chicken nuggets and M&M’s during a 2 a.m. Netflix marathon. (Walmart, GADS and McDonalds hold a permanent place in my heart for this reason.)

It's affordable.

When I said I was ballin’ on a budget, y'all, I was not lying. I’ve got about 23 cents to my name at any given moment. I live that broke college struggle. That means that if I need a new pullover, y’all will see me in the check-out line with my $4 fleece lined sweatshirt with a smile on my face. While I love Target… it makes my wallet cry too much.

It actually has some pretty cute clothes.

I think a lot of people dismiss Walmart’s clothing section just because it’s Walmart, but I’m here to tell you that Walmart sells some pretty cute stuff. Oh, and fleece leggings are only $7. Hello. Score.

It has everything you need, all in one place.

Walmart is a heaven for the broke and busy college student to get everything they need in one perfect place.

(The only problem with this: finding things you didn’t know you needed. Like that cute notebook with puppies on it. Or those chocolate covered pretzels that were on sale. Or six pints of ice cream. Or new rain boots. See my problem?)

It’s free entertainment.

Why not watch “People of Walmart” in real life? Why not have a lightsaber battle in the toy section with your friends, dressed in ninja turtle masks? When everything else shuts down in this town, and you’ve already been bowling six times this month, Wal-Mart provides free entertainment 24 hours a day.

They have the best toys.

Let's be real. You might be 20 years old, but the toy isle can get you every time. Who can say no to bouncy balls and life-size stuffed animals?

They sell endless varieties of pizza.

I am obsessed with pizza, but not like in a cute way where you would be like, "Oh, that girl really enjoys pizza," because it's more like, "I'm pretty sure she just tried to stuff an extra slice of pizza into her backpack from Fresh." Anyway, Walmart has every kind of pizza your pizza-loving heart desires.

And it's beautiful.

They have the best office supplies.

(Mostly because they have those cool princess coloring packs next to the crayons and markers. Not because I know anything about that or anything.) Seriously, though, for a girl who has a weird affinity for all things school supply related, the neatly organized lines of post-its and paperclips make me happy.

You never know what you'll find.

Zoo animal plates? A cup shaped like a dinosaur? Glue bubbles? Get them all, in every color.

They sell dinosaur chicken nuggets.

Hear me out on this one: dinosaur chicken nuggets taste better than any other chicken nugget you've ever had. They pair nicely with a side of Kraft Mac 'n Cheese.

No other place lets you ride the bicycles without consequence.

Sometimes you need to test drive a tricycle that is three times smaller than you are. Walk-Mart employees understand. Especially the third shift ones.

So the next time you are broke and need some new clothes, good food or free entertainment, keep Walmart in mind. Let's make it high-key bomb, y'all.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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