You may have heard the recent news of Taylor Swift accusing a man of groping her inappropriately at a 2013 meet-and-greet event. During a photo, former Denver DJ David Mueller allegedly lifted up Swift's skirt and grabbed her bare butt. Taylor initially made the accusation, which he claimed led to the loss of his career as a DJ. He filed a lawsuit for up to $3 million, and Taylor's counter-suit sought a symbolic $1. Now that the case is complete, she is $1 richer due to the fact that Mueller could not prove that Swift did, in fact, ruin his career.
While I applaud Taylor for coming forward and standing up for herself and for all victims of sexual assault, I do not believe that reporting any type of assault, whether it be sexual or physical, is the right choice for everyone or every situation.
Personally, I do think that survivors who do report their assault are incredibly courageous and strong for doing so. But, coming from someone who has been in an abusive relationship, reporting is not always the best option, and survivors should not be judged or thought of as weak if they make the choice not to report.
First off, for example, the case of Taylor Swift occurred in 2013. It is now 2017. Four years later and all parties are still dealing with this event. Also, even four years down the road, the victim must testify, stating everything that occurred in detail. Discussing the events of an assault can be very heavy for anyone to handle, especially if you're the one who had to live through it. While assault can be a traumatic, life-changing event, many victims, including myself, want to move past the event and go on with their lives. While this case is extreme as far as its timeline, there are many that are much longer, and the shortest can take months to lead to a final decision.
In addition, reporting an assault can be very inconvenient, detrimental and even dangerous for the victim. Even if you are not a public figure, the details of a reported assault can go public. With this being said, there is always the chance that the public may not believe the victim. Even though only 2-8 percent of sexual assault accusations are false, the victim will have to prove his or herself to the judge and jury. With any trial comes massive amounts of money, time and possibly traveling. Some may not have the finances or time to carry this burden. Also, usually in the case of an abusive relationship, there is sometimes the threat of the perpetrator coming after the victim or their loved ones if they choose to make an accusation, which may be something victims are not willing to risk.
Reporting is the only chance of the perpetrator being punished, even though the chances are very slim. Studies show that only about 40 percent of rapes are reported, and only 3 percent of perpetrators spend any time in jail. Some feel that reporting an assault is worth it, and some do not. This is not me saying that you should just give up and that reporting an assault is never worth it, because it can be, and the more people who do report the crime, the higher the chance of perpetrators being imprisoned.
While reporting an assault takes immense amounts of composure, bravery and patience, it may not be the right choice for every victim and every circumstance. Victims who make the choice not to report, should not receive any judgement or criticism, but the love and support they deserve from their loved ones and their community.
