"Things change. And friends leave. And life doesn't stop for anybody."
(from The Perks of Being A Wallflower, written by Stephen Chbosky)
This is not an easy topic to discuss. Saying goodbye usually makes people sad, and since the world today is so focused on blinding its inhabitants with glittering bliss, the conversation about saying goodbye rarely gets past "Goodbyes are so sad. Let's talk about something else."
To be honest, you should be thankful every time somebody says goodbye to you. They could have left without a word. They could have cut you and everyone else in their life completely off.
They could have disappeared.
The fact is, saying goodbye and leaving are two of the most natural things in life. While they might be hard to accept, they are inevitable. You must face them, instead of being oblivious to them. You might not understand why they left at first, but you will at some point or another.
This is not a sugary sweet "I'm going to make you feel better about your crumbled relationships with a hug and a piece of pie" article.
This is the truth.
The longer you wait to accept their departure, the more painful it will be for you in the long run.
People enter and exit your life for all sorts of different reasons. And it will never stop. New people will never stop entering your life, and everyone can't stay in your life forever. Some people will stay in your life until the day you die, some will stay for a period of time, and others will be gone after a few weeks. Either way, they arrived for a reason, and they will depart for a reason as well.
Accept the fact that they probably won't be coming back into your life.
If they do come back, then I was wrong. But it's much healthier for your mental state to let them go than to hold onto something that might never happen. I had to learn this the hard way. This all might sound cynical to those reading this (it sounds cynical to me and I'm the one writing it), but instead of thinking of it as giving up on the chance of them coming back to you, think of it as moving on. Forward and sky-high. You will never be able to fly if you're tied to a cinderblock.
If they left on bad terms with you, you don't need them. If they tried to leave on good terms with you, they care.
Odds are, you are better off without them if they left on bad terms. The people who truly want you in their life, and want to be in yours, will make an effort to do so. No sugar-coating, no bullshit, no fluff. On the other hand, you, of course, have the right to choose who's in your life and who isn't, but don't be blind to those who try. Even if they broke your heart into the smallest pieces you've ever seen when they left, if they tried even the slightest bit to make sure you didn't hate them at the end of it, they must care about you at least a little...right? You, at the end of the day, must make the final decision.
The most important thing to remember is that everyone has reasons for the things they do. You might not understand them yourself, but to that person, leaving might have been the best option for them, and possibly for you too. Would you rather accept it and venture forth? Or sit and dwell? The choice is yours.
