"This is MY year. I'm going to __________." Whether or not we like to admit it, we've all been guilty of thinking or saying some version of this. The goals that fill in the blank range from exercise- to organization- to relationship-related, but they all seem to end up forgotten or unfulfilled by the end of the year. We simply either don't have the time, energy or motivation to actually keep our resolutions. If they are fulfilled by the end of the year, it's usually by luck or coincidence rather than because we actually had it on our mind and worked on it.

I think a big part of the reason that resolutions seem to always fail is because we are relying on our own strength to complete our own self-centered wishes. This isn't to bash anyone; I've done it too. We think we know what we need to make our lives "better" in the coming year and then think we have the power to make it happen.

The first problem lies in us thinking our lives need to be better. While none of us are without at least some trouble or struggle in some area of life, we all have blessings. Maybe you don't have that perfect body you want, but you're perfectly healthy. Maybe you haven't met that special someone, but you have amazing friends in your life who love you unconditionally. We all have so much to be thankful for that we shouldn't even be wishing for anything else on top of it. If anything we should be helping the less fortunate or giving back to the people in our lives, but we continue to be selfish and think that our lives won't be good enough until we have X, Y or Z. We have to know this simply isn't true. Having a six-pack, a boyfriend or girlfriend, or a clean house is NOT going to bring you a better quality of life if it doesn't include God.

The second problem lies in us thinking we know exactly what we need in our lives when God knows it better. When we fully trust God, we know it is His will we should be praying for rather than our own. Again, I'm totally guilty of trusting my own plan over God's but I've been praying extensively about it. Until we accept that God's plan trumps our own, we may be wishing for something that God knows is not in our best interest.

The third and final problem lies in us relying on our own strength to fulfill our resolutions. We may have a perfectly great resolution that is in line with God's plan for our lives, but if we rely on ourselves to complete it, it most likely won't happen. We are forgetful, flawed, lazy and unmotivated at times. You really think if you put your mind to it you're going to be able to stick to that diet? Maybe you will. But so much comes out of us relying on God to work through us to complete our resolutions. If we pray to God every day for strength and motivation, and trust Him completely, there's a much greater chance our resolution will not only come to be, but will bring Him glory.

My personal solutions for anyone struggling with not completing resolutions are to (1) Count your blessings and really take to heart the fact that nothing outside of God will bring you more happiness than you have right now, at least not in the long run. (2) Pray for God to reveal what He wants your New Year's "Resolutions" to be. Is he calling you to spend more time with loved ones? To spend more time alone? To take up a new hobby that's been on your heart? Trust that He will reveal it to you and listen to what He is saying, even if it isn't what you expected or even wanted. Trust His goodness. And finally, (3) Set daily reminders if your resolution is something you want to work at every day, and pray for strength, encouragement and motivation. Spend time with God more often (in the word, praying, learning about Him) and see how He transforms your life. When you love Him, your eyes are fixed on Him and it is easier to see how He is answering your prayers and working in your life. He won't let you down and you won't regret it, I promise. It may be difficult at first, but you will see your life change before your eyes and you will have more joy than ever before.

Finally, even if you don't end up fulfilling the resolution you made at the start of the year, it's OKAY. It's okay if you didn't lose that 10 pounds, make any new friends or organize your desk. It's okay if you feel worse than you did at the start of the year because there is not some timeline that says that by 2017 you have to do X, Y and Z. It's ridiculous to expect yourself to complete every resolution in a year when some resolutions take a lifetime. For instance, if you want to be more at peace with the way you look, you may realize it's much more complex than just attempting to change your thoughts in the course of one calendar year.

I hope this helps anyone making a New Years' resolution this year, and I hope 2017 is blessed, peaceful, and joyous.