I define my own success.

I no longer feel the need to make it big in the sense of becoming society’s version of successful. Not too long ago, I truly bought into this belief that in order to really “make it” I had to move to a big city shortly after graduating college, make a ton of money, have the finest things and live an excessively luxurious lifestyle. Part of this came from the general stigma that once you graduate you’re thrown into the real world and I felt the pressure to not only keep my head above water, but to excel financially. This also stemmed from the fact that I fell prey to the illusion of social media far too often. I wanted my own fairytale working-girl narrative. I also quite often hear some of my peers expressing their strong desire to “get out of here” and I felt that I needed to want that for myself too. I don't feel that way anymore.

Approaching my graduation, I looked a bit more into what it takes to have this aforementioned lifestyle. I will be the first to admit that I not only do not have what it takes, but I also do not want to do what it takes to reach this lifestyle. I found that what attracted me to it was nothing more substantial than its appearance. Essentially, I wanted the image, not the lifestyle itself. I learned that many of these people have to be so dedicated to their careers that they have little to no time for a social life. Work, for them, becomes their social life. Dressing up is not something they do for fun or to look nice, but rather, something mandatory. What I do want is to work towards a career that makes my heart sing. I want something that makes me excited and motivated to work on from 9-5 pm. I want a life that lets me spend time with my family and celebrate with my friends, not one that I need to be married to in order to post cool pictures or be idolized for from afar. I’m not knocking those that do want to pursue a life centered around their careers. More power to them! It’s a very admirable way of living. However, to say that it is the life for me is a lie stemming from the fear I have to go against the grain.

I know I have worked hard for my degree because it was something I wanted. I know other people that have had success in their fields because nobody wanted it more than they did. I then have learned that it comes down to living the life you want and not the life you feel you are supposed to want.

I want to make it big in my own way. I want to define my own concept of success and blow past that goal. I want to let go of what my peers, society, and social media believes that I need to do or how I need to live because I know that will always lead me down a path of unhappiness.