While scrolling through Facebook, have you ever seen one of those obnoxious videos or memes that talk about big Italian families? These videos often consist of tons of food, loud talkers, and little old ladies depicting what a typical Italian family surrounds their lives around. I would like to sit here and tell you that those videos are false; however, 9 out of 10 times, they are pretty accurate.
My grandmother (we call her Mom-mom) was born in Italy then moved to Argentina where she met my grandfather and decided to come to the United States. Being a young couple from two different countries that spoke two different languages, it was difficult at first to adjust to a new lifestyle especially when neither of them knew very much English. Over time, they became accustomed to the American-way of living and made a very good life for themselves. Although, my Mom-mom never forgot her roots.
You know that stereotype you hear that all Italians like to do is cook and feed people? Well that one would be true. My Mom-mom loves to feed the people in her life. Thinking about using a jar of Rago for dinner? Absolutely not; you make your sauce from scratch. See that plate of food she just put in front of you? Yeah, you better eat the whole damn thing or she’s going to assume you don’t like her cooking and trust me, you NEVER want to an Italian woman to think you don’t like her cooking. Also, Sunday night dinner is a thing and yes, of course it is pasta.
Another label Italians get is that they are loud talkers. Once again, that would be correct. I couldn’t tell you why but it almost seems as if Italians have an extra height to their voices. So when you are all surrounded around the dinner table and you have something to say, you better clear your throat and speak up or trust me, you won’t be heard. And if your family is anything like mine, you’ll see that grandmother’s English is pretty broken so when she speaks to you, she mixes her English, Italian, and the little bit of Spanish she knows all into one language and you just have to decipher it as you go. Not only do we speak loudly but also using hand motions. If I’m telling an intense story about the crazy man that cut me off at the super market, you can bet my hands are swinging around just to add to the craziness of my story.
We’re also very traditional as in the women are still in control of the household. I know what you’re thinking; why would anyone want to wait on a man hand and foot like we’re still in the 50’s. Here’s the thing: by head of the household, I mean us women are bosses (yes, I meant that in the cool I’m Queen B run-the-world kind-of-way). I may serve my grandfather, my father, and my brothers their food when we sit down at the dinner table but I also have 5 men that would and will do anything for me. From having my car fixed and cleaned to protecting me, the men in our family will always defend us women. And you know what, I like it that way.
Every culture and every family is different. Some people are not so traditional, whereas some people are their stereotypes to a T. Here are my thoughts: you may not agree with how my family is or the traditions we follow but here’s the thing – no one ever asked for your approval (sorry not sorry). Your family does things their own way and so does mine. And you know what, I love my heritage and am proud of it; I’m grateful every day for the family I have and the way they have raised me. I will forever have a family that has my back no matter what. They have thought me traditions that I will continue to carry on.
So next time you see one of those videos with the little old lady telling someone, “Eat more food, you look to skinny. I’m going to make you more food,” remember that most of us Italians have a grandmother just like that woman and we wouldn’t trade her for the world.
