As a little girl, I had this strange notion that I was the only one in my school who felt insecure in her own skin. Everyone else seemed so happy, so flawless. From as young as eight years old, I stacked up my own worth based on how I looked compared to my classmates and beat myself up when the odds weren't exactly in my favor. I wasn't pretty enough, my stomach was too large, my nose was too big and I wasn't as smart as them. I truly drilled the thought into my head that everyone else was prettier than me and that no one else but me felt sad when they looked in the mirror.

Oh, how I was wrong...

Self-esteem issues rattle so many little girls and boys in our society and sometimes that low self-worth and body image does not go away once puberty is no longer a monster creeping under the bed at night. Adults are not immune to the crippling mantra of being "your own worst critic." Sometimes, this grueling self-critique breaks people down and is hard to defeat.

Eight-year-old me eventually grew up, but the evil villain known as Low Self-Esteem still loomed over me as I entered my teens. However, one thing did change towards the end of my high school career—I

began to realize that the girls I thought were perfect also felt a certain sadness in themselves. Some voice telling them they weren't pretty enough, that their thighs were too big, arms too skinny or face too overwhelmed with pimples. That really saddened me. These girls were gorgeous. I was envious of them and saw them as without a fault or care in the world; but, now I could see that even pretty girls aren't exempt from struggling with poor body image.

It then occurred to me and nothing would ever be the same. The epiphany came to me in a flash and I thought, If these girls think they have flaws that I just don't see, does that mean my own low self-esteem is just as unprecedented as theirs?

Maybe I deserve to love my own body.

Slowly (and definitely not surely), I tried to change how I viewed myself. I dressed in clothes that made me feel at my best. I started experimenting with makeup. I tried to see parts of myself that I liked when I looked in the mirror, not just the flaws. I even started taking selfies which is, ultimately, what I attribute to me finally feeling pretty enough. I know it's a cliche, but I made my new mantra "fake it until you make it." And I have to say, it's a cliche for a reason. Before I knew it, I no longer had to pretend to like my chubby face, uneven lips, or how my arms look in photos. There, in the mirror's glass as clear as day, I felt like I'd regained my own identity.

Of course, learning to love myself was only half the battle. The issue then became that other people were upset that I suddenly wasn't waiting on their opinion to make or break my perception of myself. I posted too many selfies, validated myself too much by being confident in my strengths. And, acting upon a cardinal sin of femininity that appalled and offended many, I even called myself pretty from time to time.

I guess I should face the facts, huh? As a teenage girl in our Western culture, I will be labeled as egotistical if I'm seen taking a selfie or primping my appearance in the mirror. I will be perceived as stuck-up if I accept a compliment without initially rejecting the comment as absurd or untrue. I will be denoted as fake and deceptive if I wear makeup, a devious vixen tricking poor guys into thinking my eyelids are naturally this purple.

In a world where girls are sexualized at a young age and expected to be only as worthwhile as their appearance, why do we criticize women who exude confidence? Why is it so threatening for a girl to not hate herself or for a boy to feel like his body isn't something he needs to change or bulk up to uphold the standard of masculinity? Why is it so terrible for me to tell other people they deserve to love themselves, that they don't need to gain or lose weight to be beautiful?

I will accept that there is a fine line between loving yourself and being self-absorbed, but I don't think that someone telling themselves that they matter counts as crossing a boundary. Being self-absorbed or narcissistic is when you are so focused on your own desires, needs, or perception of yourself that you believe you are the pinnacle of excellence and worthier than other people. That, my friends, is called a superiority complex and that's when you've gone too far. But, the simple act of telling yourself that you are good enough or smart enough—that

you are beautiful no matter your weight or body shape—is

not a superiority complex.

That is providing yourself, a basic foundation for living a happy life where no one's opinion about how you look but your own carries any influence on how you perceive yourself. You can still care about other people when you care for yourself. If anything, I think self-love allows people to better see the beauty in others and feel more inclined to make others feel beautiful. When you know what's it's like to feel down about yourself, you'll make it your mission to make other people feel worthwhile.

I'm still a work-in-progress, there's no denying that., but whatever effort I have to put in to become a better person or to live a healthier lifestyle will be all the more easy and rewarding because I already know that I'm enough. I know I deserve being happy and feeling beautiful.

And I know you deserve to feel that way, too. Everyone should feel comfortable within themselves, love themselves and care for their body because it's the only one we have in this life.

If we only learned to value self-love more within our society, I think we could solve a lot of problems involving low self-esteem, obsessive dieting, eating disorders and depression that plague young kids nowadays. Kids should grow up understanding that being pretty doesn't define you, but neither do your flaws. Kids should know what self-love is and that they deserve to feel beautiful within what makes them unique.

If you're still convinced that I'm a narcissist, then so be it, because I would rather be perceived as egotistical than to go back to being a shy little girl who would cry when she looked in the mirror. I'd rather have people call me conceited than to rely on other people's opinions of me to determine if I'm worthy or good enough. That's no way to live your life, and that's why I'm never going back.