No matter how many people say it or how many times you hear it a day, in this day and age, it is so difficult to feel beautiful, worthy, or wanted. We live in a society where our self-esteem relies on how many likes we receive on a picture we post on our social media. It is hard to believe we are beautiful when the likes on our most recent picture are not pouring in. The façade of beauty that is portrayed in the media is a fake, unrealistic expectation on how we should look. Men expect women to be perfect like the models in the magazines (while not considering the immense amount of plastic surgery and makeup it took to get the woman to look like that) and women expect men to be built, clean-cut and perfect as well (not considering that famous men actually wear tons of makeup as well.) With the colossal impractical expectations of beauty that constantly haunt young people today, it is hard to believe anyone can truly feel beautiful or good enough for societal judgement.

How is a normal woman like me supposed to feel worthy of a man’s attention or affection when I am not a size zero and I do not have perfect hair? How will I allow myself to be respected and appreciated when I feel like I do not deserve it because I am not perfect? Why do I feel like my only important attribute is the way I look and I do not consider who I am as a person? I have a brain, I have multiple talents, I have a good heart, but I believe no one pays attention to what is on the inside. People care about the size of someone’s chest or behind, if they have perfect skin, hair, and teeth, if you are perfect you are worthy. If I am not perfect I feel like I do not deserve a great romance or to be treated like I matter, I do not deserve to be lifted off my feet and swept away with kindness or admiration. Maybe romance like the romance in the movies does not exist because I do not look like a movie star, I am not flawless.

The struggle of feeling so unwanted for so long is that when someone does truly want you and appreciates you, it is harder for you to notice and you do not know how to react and end up pushing that person away. If we push away everyone who actually respects us we will cling to people who treat us badly and rely on people who do not care about our worth.

What can low self-esteem lead to?

Assuming you will fail at things you do, commonly leads problems such as depression or anxiety.

Low self-esteem can make it hard to try new things or complete tasks, this can stop you from living your life and lead to frustration and depression.

Low self-esteem can cause people to develop harmful behaviors as coping mechanisms, such as committing to damaging or abusive relationships, experimenting with drugs or drinking to excess.

Could cause you to isolate yourself and withdraw from social contact, if you are constantly concerned about how people may see you.

How can I improve my self-esteem?

The way that you think about yourself has a huge effect on your self-esteem. If you continue to tell yourself that you’re not good enough, you might just start to believe it even though it’s not true. Try reminding yourself about all the good things you have to offer and develop a more positive self-image.

Try not to compare yourself to everyone around you, although it is tempting to measure our own worth against other people, everyone is different and you should embrace your own beauty.

Exercise helps to improve your mood and the way you feel about yourself.

• Don’t be discouraged if you make a mistake, it is an absolute true fact that everyone makes mistakes (yes, even celebrities and successful figures). You must choose to learn from your mistakes and move on.
• Engage in activities you enjoy, if you engage in activities you enjoy you’re more likely to be thinking optimistically.
• Surround yourself with supportive friends, family, peers, etc.Don’t engage with people who constantly bring you down. Discover a group of friends who make you feel good about yourself and avoid those who trigger your negative thinking.

You are an amazing human being and you have a lot to offer in this world! Do not let the pressures of society control your life and realize you are good enough for anyone, you are worthy, and you are beautiful in your own way!