You’re probably wondering why I titled this post what I did. Well, I wanted to be completely honest writing this and I knew the title would make you want to read it. ;)
So lately I’ve found myself feeling incredibly blessed that I don’t have people in my life telling me, “you’re not good enough.” In fact, they do the exact opposite. But I do have a little voice in my head telling me I don’t measure up, and I feel like that’s even worse.
So here it goes- I don’t have a boyfriend and I’ve been in school for five years. It hasn’t been easy. But I don’t want to make this about me because it’s not. At all.
I truly believe that we are to lead the life that God has called us to. And right now, being single and a super senior is where I’m supposed to be.
So my freshman year at Winthrop University wasn’t exactly what I signed up for- I hated my classes, I had no friends, it was awful. So I transferred to a community college for a year and a half and then I came back to Winthrop in the spring of my junior year. That’s where I found the friend group my cousin Anna and I had prayed so earnestly for. They were everything we had asked for- believers, loving, and supportive.
And as for being single, that’s been an entirely different hardship in itself. My sister Megan and I are super close and we talk about everything- she’s my best friend. It’s almost like we go through the same struggles but at different times so we encourage and lift up one another. But anyway, we were talking and I mentioned to her I was writing this blog post and her words just pierced me, “You’ve really got to stop comparing yourself. Confidence is beautiful.” And she’s so right. I feel like I (and a lot of girls) look to other girls and feel like I have to measure up to them. And that’s so wrong. We should want to be more and more like Christ. If this is our temporary home, why does it even matter if we are “good enough” in someone else’s eyes?
Right now I’m learning to be content and to have patience. God defines my life, not my marital status or if I’ve graduated college yet.
So I’m working on making sure I’m only ever looking at my neighbor to admire their beauty- and not to check and see how I measure up.
I am living as I have been called by The Author of life.
Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. Philippians 3:12
