Religion. Only an eight letter word, but boy does it carry so much weight.
For a lot of people it's a source of happiness, faith, support, and like a second family. A home away from home. For others—like me—it's more like the elephant in the room. Something you know exists and is widely recognized and cherished by society, but foreign to you. It's safe to say that I feel like an outlier when it comes to religion.
I remember when someone asked me about my religion—are you Christian, Catholic, Jewish, etc.—and drawing a blank. It was involved in a elementary class discussion, actually. I was young and clueless, but the question was simple, really. What is your faith? I don't remember the details of the discussion, but I do remember not having an answer.
When I got home after school that day, I asked my mom what my answer should have been, as if I didn't really have a say in the matter. She gave me a look—the kind of look that Moms give you when you say something stupid—and said: "Alex, you're Catholic. You've always been Catholic."
Have I? I thought. I didn't question her, but the facts really didn't add up.
I didn't go to church growing up. I only went once or twice with my grandma and hated it. I know I was baptized as a baby, but that's the closest to "religion" that I'd ever been. And I don't even remember a thing.
I can say for certain that my Grandma is very religious—she visits church almost every day and makes custom rosaries as a hobby (this is why my Mom was kind of adamant about me being Catholic). My Grandma gave me a bible as a gift once. I can honestly say I never read a single page and lost it within week.
Needless to say, I am not the religious type. It's just hard for me to grasp. I respect the people that can, however. I know that others can find solace and enlightenment through religion, but I know personally that I cannot. And that's OK.
Now, don't get ahead of yourself and call me an Atheist. That's not what this article is about. I have some level of belief that there is a God—though I'm pretty adamant about him being deaf half the time—but I don't go to church to recognize or praise him.
Also, I don't have a definition for myself. I'm not Catholic, no matter what I've been told. How can I be Catholic if I'm unfamiliar and don't practice it? That wouldn't make sense to me. In hindsight, I really can't define myself. I'm way too unfamiliar with the other religions to branch out, such as with Judaism, Buddhism, Hinduism, etc. And I'm not a fan of certain stigmas and ideas that come with each one.
Like, I don't like the idea that someone feels like they can't vote for one of the candidates this year (even if they hate the opponent) on the basis that one of their policies goes against their faith. That's something I can't understand. To get into specifics—I know abortion is a touchy subject, and with good reason, but is that really justification enough not to vote for someone when you clearly detest the other?
Also, believing in the ideas of a book written centuries ago. I just don't get how you can take something written in a book so long ago that sounds absolutely ridiculous so close to heart. Specifically, the damnation of LGBTQ people and the strong belief in heteronormatism. I'm just not for that.
I could go on forever. How Muslims are all terrorists, apparently. All the insensitive jokes about different religions floating around. Pro-Life vs. Pro-Choice. Republican vs. Democrat. The list goes on and on.
Oh, and how a lot of our acts of violence stem from religion. Just look at our religious history (it isn't pretty).
There are just so many reasons why I have a hard time defining myself. The modern religious perspective isn't my cup of tea, and I've had no prior experience or interest in it. And it's OK if you feel the same. Don't feel like you have to define yourself in society that makes you feel like you do. Religion isn't black and white; there are a lot of grey areas that you can fit into too.
And to those who are religious, congratulations. I respect your commitment to your faith and I hope it has done you well. Just remember that not everyone has a faith that they commit to like you, and that's OK.
I'm not religious, and that's OK. And if you're not religious, that's OK too. God knows—even if he's partly deaf—that we're loved and appreciated like everybody else.
