Why I'm Not Interested in "Casual" | The Odyssey Online
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Relationships

Why I'm Not Interested in "Casual"

Seriously, why can't we just date?

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Why I'm Not Interested in "Casual"
Allie Brisentine

Here we are in 2017. As a society, we have advanced phenomenally. There are vaccines and cures we would have never dreamed of 100 years ago. I have a device in my pocket that makes the first computer look like a joke, and I can use it to communicate with literally anyone with a phone or a computer. We can fly! (Well, sort of.) Netflix exists, and so does delivery food.

One thing, however, that I wish society would do like we did in the way back when, is dating . Because, let’s be honest, dating these days is a horrifically confusing game whose rules change constantly depending on circumstance. These days, we have something called “casual.” Which, what even is that? You hang out with somebody every so often. You go out with each other. You have fun, but it’s not serious. There is no commitment behind it. You aren’t looking to grow with each other. You really have no intention of a happily ever after.

Now I’m not saying I go into every “relationship” looking for happily ever after. I am saying that if I start talking to somebody, I am looking to get to know them better. I am trying to figure out if there is a possibility of that happy ending. I am seeking compatibility. I want someone that I can have fun and be serious with. I want someone whose goal is to also grow together to the point that maybe one day we will make it a forever thing. I don’t do “casual” because I, quite frankly, just don’t see the point. Sure, it’s fun for a while, but in the end, you go your separate ways. At least one of you somewhere along the way probably ends up hurt at the end of it. Eventually, you might even begin to think it was a waste of your time, because yeah, it was fun but what did you get out of it at the end? I do not want to waste my time. I want to search for my forever, my true love, my one and only. Maybe I’ll encounter a few heartbreaks along the way, but at least I’ll know that I was trying for my happy ending while I had fun in the process.

Also, what the heck is “talking”? I mean, I know what it is, but why is it a thing? You’re not dating, but you aren’t exactly not dating either. You just “talk” to each other while going on about your lives. At what point does “talking” turn into “dating?” Is there such thing as loyalty in the talking phase, or can you “talk” to five other people too? I don’t know. I honestly cannot comprehend it. I don’t want to “talk” to you. I want to go on dates and get to know you. There doesn’t have to be any pressure. Yeah, we’re still just hanging out, but at least it is face to face and I know that you are taking it seriously.

All I am saying is that I don’t see a point in casual flings where I essentially gain nothing. No, I will not hop into a relationship saying, “Let’s get married one day.” However, I will go into relationships saying, “Yeah, I am here to have fun, but I also want to see if we’re compatible

enough to one day have a future together.” I am not asking anyone to commit the rest of their lives to me on the first date. All I am asking is to be given a chance to get to know and grow with you. So, let’s not talk. No, we won’t be casual. Yes, let’s date.
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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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