I began journaling when I was in middle school. It didn't start out as poetry or constructive reflections; my writing laid it's roots as a support system for myself. My early journals bare the details of my experiences throughout middle school. From rants about losing a friend, to tear drops on the pages that descripted how I was bullied.
I miss the innocence that came with my early writings. I wrote about how everyone should just set their opinions down and love one another. I'd share highlights like when my little crush would smile at me. My notebook wasn't going to embarrass me, share my secrets, or betray me. Once I grasped that concept, it was easy to shut the people out that didn't matter. I would just complain in my journal rather than feed into them.
Freshman year of high school I became too depressed and hopeless that I no longer took time to set aside life and just write. That was my biggest mistake. I bottled everything up and carried all my emotions and thoughts within me.
Sophomore year of high school was a year of change. I moved schools and was busy adapting. I received a call that winter that changed my life in many ways. A boy who I had dated, and still was (still am), in love with passed. I was asked to speak at the funeral if I wanted to.
I broke out a notebook and pen, and wrote draft after draft. No words were ever going to add up to describe how amazing he was, or how grave life was going to be without him. When I was up on stage reading the euology I had written, I panicked because I never thought to read anything aloud from my notebooks. I really pushed myself to be present in the moment, as I wanted Luke to hear everything I had to say to honor him. When I met with classmates and teammates of Luke, I realized that they were glad someone their age had spoken.
So I wrote from that day forward. About the good, bad, beautiful, and ugly events in life. I had no idea that my writing would one day allow me to personally heal, as well as help others, regarding many topics.
Thank you for giving me a platform, Odyssey. Thank you to the people who read and share my articles. They are to raise awareness, let others know they are not alone, create a conversation, and much more.
When you feel like you have no one to turn to, I promise you can always write. Simply write what's happening and or how you feel.
