It started slow at first, cutting out holidays that were mostly for kids and families: First went Easter and then, Fourth of July. Holidays are largely for show, we thought, so why bother celebrating them if they do not matter? Little did we know that we would eventually get to celebrating no holidays and loving it.
My partner and I have always been a bit non-traditional - it is what drew us to one another, after all. We swore off having kids, gave up on a traditional family relationship, and decided as long as we had each other and our pets, we were doing just fine. We also moved to another state, one that we only had very little exposure to, to a city where we did not know anyone. All of these things lead to where we are now, a year without holidays.
A few years back, after swearing off a few holidays, we discussed the need for giving gifts. She and I had stopped celebrating Christmas, due to religious reasons (as in, we aren't religious at all). When "American Gift Giving Holiday" (that's what we called it then) came about, presents were still a problem. "How much money should I spend?" and "the gift I got you is not as good," kept coming up, leading to anxiety around Christmas time. It turns out that it wasn't religion that was the problem, it was the pain around buying things. At that point, we only really celebrated Halloween (my personal favorite), birthdays, New Year's, and of course, American Gift Giving Holiday. It looked like Christmas, even what was remaining, had to go altogether.
After Christmas and Christmas gifts were out the window, birthdays naturally came next, as they are the next gift-related holiday. The only things that were left were, what I like to call, "drinking holidays." Halloween had not been about candy since we were kids, and New Year's stopped being about staying up until midnight. Those holidays were for drinking way too much and feeling miserable the next day. As an aging married couple, they had to go next.
Halloween was a tough one. Remember how I said my relationship was a bit alternative? Well Halloween was our favorite holiday. It still is, really, but it is the thought of being spooky and dark that is what we really like, not so much the campy decorations and big bowls of candy. Halloween was the last to go on the list of holidays. It was a tough one to part with, but the stress of coming up with new costumes, making an appearance at multiple parties so no one felt left out, and driving home during the wee hours of the morning, just did not have the draw it once did.
The biggest lesson I learned from cutting out holidays is that you just do not need them to be happy. It turns out that holidays are just a social construct designed to drive sales, force you to like your family, and carry around ugly heirlooms to put on a dying tree in your living room. If nothing else, I revel at the opportunity for my boomer coworkers to ask, "what are your plans for Thanksgiving?" and I tell them that we do NOTHING, and they are completely dumbfounded. Ok boomer, enjoy talking to your racist uncle, dabbing nephew, and screaming grandkids. I'll be on my couch, in my sweatpants, playing video games and doing whatever the hell I want to do.
