As an extremely stubborn individual and someone who has experienced drama-filled high school, I have found myself holding hateful grudges. A grudge is an awful feeling, but something that is filled with passion and so many emotions; as I now have had the chance to reflect on many of these situations I have found that grudge holding only hurts you. Grudges typically are founded after someone has deeply hurt you, or you're just being petty for no apparent reason; they bring feelings of hate, and betrayal but do not allow you to confront the issue at hand. I had been a person to hold grudges that would last years, but now am someone who takes the time to reflect and let go of negative feelings towards another.
Grudges can be extremely small or could be invoked by some of the worst possible drama filled situations. Personally, I have only ever found myself "hating" someone when they had done terrible (in my opinion) hurtful things to me, or my friends. Girls had always been the outlet for any grudge that may have once existed because they tend to be the drama fueled gender. As I mentioned earlier most of my grudges had been founded during the four years that I had spent in high school over things that had hurt me... at the time, I spent so much time thinking, and hating every person who had made me feel small, or even attempted to take things from me, but neglected to focus on what the situation had taught me. The hate that I had once had used to drive me to actually hate people for what I now believe to be petty acts of teenage girls. I spent so much time focusing on how hurt "friends" had once made me feel rather than realizing the good the situation brought. I am a strong believer in "everything happens for a reason", and as I let go of 99 percent of the grudges I hold I find this saying to be so incredibly true.
Hate is an emotion that drives every single human to feel anger that really doesn't need to be there. This emotion and grudge holding only hurts you, and your ability to be happy. I used to be a person who would hate people who had hurt me, but now I realize that they are who have made me stronger. I have learned so much, and who I had wanted to be (NOT A MEAN GIRL) through the petty filled interactions of high school. It is important to acknowledge that grudges involve hate and waste so much of your time along with feelings. This article is to help those who hate to understand that it is OK to feel hurt, and betrayed, and that having those feelings are normal. However, it is also to explain that grudges make you feel such strong hate that you only begin to lose yourself.