My entire life I could not wait to be a mom. I've always loved children and wanted to have my own (at least three). I've dreamt of family vacations, birthdays, Christmas', baseball games, moving up ceremonies, and any other family oriented event you can think of. However, over the past few years I've thought less and less about having my own family.
The reasons are not selfish. It's not because I want to focus on myself, or because I want to travel the world. It's not because having children will hold me back. It's because I don't want to bring a child into this world.
A world in which girls have eating disorders because the media makes girls feel like they will never be pretty or skinny enough.
A world where people celebrate the death of police officers, the very same people who put their lives on the line to protect us.
A world where race still divides us.
A world where children commit suicide because they have nowhere to hide from the constant bullying.
A world where terrorism is a constant threat.
A world where shopping malls, movie theaters and schools have active shooter attacks.
A world where women photoshop their own pictures to give themselves small waists and bigger boobs for recognition on social media.
A world where celebrities are our role models, and people don't even know who our vice president is.
A world where adolescents know everything about hollywood, but nothing about congress or politics.
A world where women's fashion choices are excuses for rape.
A world where a rapist gets less jail time than a man caught with minimal amounts of weed.
A world where student loans repayments cost as much as a mortgage.
The world we live in is so filled with hate and disappointment, and I want a child to be raised in a world filled with love. I don't want to kill a child's innocence by having to explain the horrible things that happen in the world.
I know they say that children are the future, and that they can change the world. I just don't want my child's spirit to be broken. I don't want my child to have to hurt for the rest of the world.
I know that eventually I will selfishly change my mind, and have a child of my own but as of right now, I don't want to.
