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Why I Won't Apologize For My High Standards

If I'm going to be making a life long commitment to someone, you're damn right I'm going to be picky.

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Why I Won't Apologize For My High Standards
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Let’s be honest. At one point or another, you have thought about staying with someone, even though you don’t think they line up with “everything you’ve ever wanted in man (or woman).” It’s comfortable; the relationship seems to be going somewhere, but for some reason, something doesn’t feel right. Well, I am here to tell you I won’t apologize for my high standards when it comes to a relationship, and you shouldn’t either.

Now, to get something straight, I’m not saying to never date anyone who doesn’t have every single quality you’ve ever wanted in a significant other. On the contrary, you should date different people. It allows you to have an understanding of the kind of characteristics you want in someone you will be sharing a future with. That means it’s OK to give the nice guy you would have never, in a million years, thought you would date a shot. But, and this, my friends, is a big but, that doesn’t mean you have to stay with them.

You’ve probably had that one friend who always wants to hook you up with their boyfriend’s friends and then ends up upset because things didn’t work out. You may have exchanged some, not-so-nice words and “picky” or “high maintenance” may have been a part of her vocabulary, and that’s OK. Honestly, you should be picky about the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.

Think about it. You have to wake up every single day next to that person, you have to smell their stinky morning breath and love them in spite of it and vice versa. You have to eat meals with them, go to boring “married” events and (maybe) have children with them. How can you not afford to be picky? Marriage is a big deal – something I take very seriously – and when I commit to someone by saying “I do,” I mean that until I take my last dying breath.

I get it, though. Sometimes it’s hard to keep those high standards, especially in our society. With a lot of people around us getting engaged, graduating and making scary life-long decisions, it’s hard not to pick the first guy who is interested.

I’ve been single for about a year and a half now. I’ve been on a couple dates with some awesome guys who would make great husbands some day. Were there elements within the relationship that would make me want to commit? Of course! (Hello! One guy wanted to spend his life finding a cure for cancer, talk about adorable!) But, there were other things I just wasn’t willing to settle on.

When I say settling, I don’t mean that he wasn’t handsome enough, nice enough or even tall enough (height is a priority for me). I mean that; there were just certain parts of his life I couldn’t see myself being a part of, and here’s the secret: That’s OK.

I do have an image in my head about what my perfect guy looks like, what his parents are like, what his favorite books are and most importantly if he would be OK with my obsession with french fries. These are just some things I already have in my head, but it doesn’t mean this is exactly what he is going to look like.

I would be OK if he may be the same height as I am or if he doesn’t love french fries; after all, everyone makes mistakes. But things like how he interacts with my family, if he wants to have kids and what he does for me when I’m having a bad day are the things I’m not willing to settle on.

Those are the things that mean more than if he has blonde hair, blue eyes and loves puppies. So, I’m going to be picky. I’m going to look for the type of guy who meets the standards I have set and most importantly, I’m not going to apologize for these standards I have placed. Because, after all, "until death do us part" is a long time to spend with someone who doesn’t have the same standards for me as I do for them.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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