Everyone knows I have a Boston accent. Everyone knows I talk funny. Everyone does not know what I am saying.
Now, I do not mean people misunderstanding what I am saying because of my accent. I will leave out the whole “khakis” versus “car keys” debacle, using the word “wicked” all the time, sometimes forgetting the letter “r” and anything else people like to comment on. I am strictly talking about actual words or phrases that for some reason lost all meaning when I left the state of Massachusetts.
My first problem was actually leaving the state of Massachusetts, going to a school in New York, and thinking everyone was on the same page as me. I get that. Clearly, there were a lot of holes in certain situations that I did not see coming. So here are a few of the “new” words I had to explain to people versus the ones that I learned myself.
1. Rotary vs. Roundabout
I consider myself a good driver. I thought that I knew all the signs of the road and the differences between certain traffic stops. But apparently, the term “rotary” is not a universal term. Some call it a roundabout—acceptable. But apparently a “traffic circle” is accepted? Let’s be a little more creative here, people. I will never forget the time I was giving directions to my girlfriend over the phone and she got lost because I told her to “take the second exit out of the rotary” and she had no idea what I was talking about.
2. Sub vs. Hero
I am a big food guy. If I am not currently eating I am thinking about my next meal. But, the first time someone said they got an Italian “hero,” I had no idea what they were talking about. Batman? Thor? No, a foot-long sandwich. I will never understand why people are calling a type of a sandwich a hero and I will never use that term. There are also the few unfortunate people who call it a “hoagie.” But we won’t go there.
3. Pizza vs. Pie
Fall has begun and a nice warm apple pie sounds delicious. Oh, just kidding, we’re talking about a pepperoni pizza. This may be the most frustrating one. I do not understand how we can just go from a slice of pizza to a totally different dessert. How is this ok? Picture this:
“Excuse me, can I have a large pie?”
“Of course, would you like blueberry or apple?”
“Um, I’ll take a chicken bacon ranch.”
Sorry, no.
4. Jimmies vs. Sprinkles
Rainbow sprinkles. Chocolate jimmies. End of discussion. How are you supposed to differentiate otherwise? We are talking about ice cream, people! You cannot just say sprinkles and take a chance on whether or not the ice cream person will give you chocolate or rainbow.
5. Packie vs. Alcohol
I myself do not use the term “packie” too often. But, if I ask someone to go on a packie run, I assume they know what I mean. Also under this category, beer and liquor apparently cannot be sold in the same store in New York. Real inconvenience for when you want to mix things up and have some fun one night. Massachusetts’ package stores—one-stop shopping.
6. Clicker vs. Remote
A universal debate that will never get old—clicker or remote. Personally, I am a clicker guy, but I can accept remote. Once I heard “channel changer.” Let’s just say I needed to go make a packie run after that one.
7. Frappe vs. Milkshake
To be honest, I go back and forth on this one. If it says milkshake on the menu, I usually just stick to that. But, the fact that some people have never even heard of the word “frappe” is just mind-boggling.
8. Bubbler vs. Water Fountain
You drink from a bubbler. You throw change into a water fountain.
9. Carriage vs. Shopping Cart
Again, I am a big food guy. So, walking around the supermarket, you are pushing a carriage. I guess in my case, it might sound a little weird and people might think I am pushing around a baby and not groceries. But, I refuse to call it a shopping cart and it will always be a carriage to me.
A Mass vs. New York debate on any topic will always be fun. If you think these few are frustrating, just imagine what I have to listen to every day at school…