In today's media-saturated culture, the Internet and digital communication devices have become a primary means of social connection. We share big news like engagement and grad school acceptance with our friends on Facebook instead of with a phone call or a knock on their door.
Communication through these media has affected not only the way we interact with friends, but it has profoundly impacted the dating world. Texts from the car have replaced walking up to the door on a first date. Meeting at the library has been replaced by swiping right on Tinder. Flirting in a witty conversation has become crafting and re-crafting the perfect Instagram comment. I posit that this shift is a negative one in the world of dating. Interaction via the Internet or text is hollow compared to rich, authentic personal interaction.
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The Cons of Digital Dating:
1. You don't have to have courage.
Commenting on a photo with your thumbs on your iPhone in your living room may take a little courage, but not nearly as much as saying "you look beautiful" when you're standing face to face with a pretty girl. You want someone who is bold and thoughtful of what they say to you.
2. It can easily be superficial.
It is so much easier to be dishonest with someone for the sake of making yourself look better or not wanting to hurt someone's feelings when you cannot see their face. Conversations can be carried on much longer through impersonal media than they might be in real life. A relationship built on an artificial foundation can easily be lost.
3. It takes no effort.
Creating a relationship over social media or text message can be done with convenience and little thought. Showing up, asking someone out, and listening during a conversation are hard but worthy tasks.
Meaningful relationships take effort, courage, and authenticity. If you want something that lasts and is real, don't text back. Wait for the one who is willing to come up to you and ask you on a date.
We are the only ones who can change the dating culture. No one is going to change it for us. Don't play the game of likes on Facebook or right swipes on Tinder. Be engaged in conversations and real-time interactions, and you will find that relationships, romantic or companionate, can be rich and weird and laughable and awkward and full of meaning.
