I've put a lot of thought over the years into the answer to "what's your favorite holiday?" For a long while it was my birthday simply because it was the one day a year when I could do anything I wanted to do and it was okay because it was my birthday. As I got older, I liked Halloween because I could be who ever I wanted, no one would question, and I got a ton of free candy for dressing up as a vampire queen or Sleeping Beauty. Now, those come in close second to my now favorite holiday. My reasons are mostly just as selfish as the other two, but probably a lot more pathetic and less about getting things (although that's nice too).

Christmas, or really any holiday around December, isn't always about the presents or food or a football game. Christmas is about tradition and giving for me. I love watching someone open a present I got them and it causes the biggest smile on their face. I love hearing about people helping out charities, whether it's money or man power. I love see the people who love the holidays be nice and hold a door open for a mom with three kids and 12 grocery bags all giving her a hassle at once. I love how, even if someone's having an awful day, when you give them a smile as you help them out with change or just pick up something they dropped, you know that'll be on their mind all day and make their Christmas just a bit brighter. It's the one time a year that I know for sure that even if my smile might not be able to be as big as I want it, it can still touch someone enough to help them spread a bit of cheer too.

The second reason why Christmas the most is it seems like this is the only time a year that tradition still somewhat stands in my family, even if my whole life has changed. In the last 6 months my life has turned upside down completely, and handling it has been interesting to say the least. My parents separated this summer, our funds have been cut because of the divorce, and my dad just learned he has cancer. I have been looking forward to Christmas for a long time now to say the least. I've been promised the traditional cookie day where we make mounds of holiday desserts and single Rocking Around the Christmas Tree, Jingle Bell Rock, and Home for the Holidays in awful mocking, but beautiful voices and dance really badly. I'm looking forward to seeing my Dad smile and laugh as I tell him some anecdote from school. I'm looking forward to my mom and/or my sister shake me awake at 6 in the morning because they can't wait to see us all open presents on Christmas morning and let me sleep in already. I'm sad it won't be with both parents, but I'm glad I can hold on to that thought that somethings will never change no matter what happens.

I guess Christmas is my favorite holiday because it gives me some kind of hope that not all things good are gone, even if everything changes around me. Holding on to constants is sometimes all we have, even if we have to find the constants in the constants to keep in out memories. And even if my memories fade, I know the feeling that the holiday season brings to be will always be in my heart, and that's the most important part.