When my boyfriend of two years and I broke up, I was sad of course. Sad is an understatement, though. I was devastated. We were supposed to be the couple that stayed together forever. We were "relationship goals" in our friends' eyes. We were supposed to be the high school sweethearts that ended up getting married. I really thought that that was going to be our future.
Life doesn't go as planned sometimes.
When I went away to college, I kept hearing people around me saying that high school relationships don't make it through college. I didn't listen to them because I knew that we were the exception. We have made it through so many other turmoils, I figured long distance wouldn't be that difficult either.
Sadly, our relationship started to become a bit rocky. We were arguing constantly and neither of us was happy anymore. We both knew it, but we tried to hold on to what we had because we were scared of losing one another.
As much as I wanted us to work out, I knew that being apart was best for both of us. We needed to grow up and figure out who we actually are. I always hear people say that if two people love each other, they'll get through anything and everything, and grow together. I agree to that on some level. However, I believe taking a break is necessary.
I have learned a lot about myself since the breakup. I am discovering exactly who Jonnae is and what I want for my future. I have also come to the conclusion that being in a relationship right now is not the best move for me. I am only 19 and I want to use my college years to focus on being the best me that I can be and have a successful future.
Of course, I have days where I miss him and I being an "us," but I know that this decision was best for both of us. I am so blessed that we can still remain friends, though. Not many ex-couples can say that.
I can tell that he's happier, too. He doesn't do things to please everyone else. He does it because he truly wants to, something he never used to do before. He is more confident and sure of himself. I am happy for him. I am happy that he is happy.
Our breakup was not us giving up on each other, it was us allowing each other to grow without holding each other back. I believe that if you can let go of someone to allow them to grow into the amazing person that they are meant to be, then that is true love and sacrifice.
He will always have a special place in my heart. I mean, he is my first love after all.