We’ve all been there, granted some of us more than others: the third wheel to a relationship. It’s a term that brings horror, fear, and loathing to singles everywhere, but despite the bad reputation that has built up, third wheeling is not as bad is it seems. Now I’m not saying I necessarily enjoy being the designated third wheel to couples, but when you tag along with couples endlessly, there’s a lot you can learn from it.
For starters, if your friend is beginning a new relationship and you haven’t properly scoped out their significant other yet, tagging along with the two of them is your chance to either give your seal of approval or advise your friend of some potential dating red flags. After all, you are the best person to bring them back down to earth since you are not blinded by puppy love. Fair warning: third wheeling with a couple at this stage in a relationship may subject you to witness increased PDA, cheesy terms of endearment, and possibly even talking in a baby voice. Again, it’s puppy love and you’ve been warned.
It may be hard to believe, but third wheeling can make you more sociable. Sometimes with friends, you’re so close that you run out of things to talk about, so you end up spending time together in silence as you scroll through your phones. Some applaud these types of friendships where you become so comfortable with each other that words don’t always need to be exchanged, but adding a third person to the mix can spark conversations and make for a pretty social time.
Finally, and most importantly, third wheeling can be good because it shows you exactly what type of relationship you want to be in when your time finally comes. Always stuck with the couple that can’t even leave the room without the other? Perhaps seeing this teaches you that you desire a partner who will give you a bit more space and independence, and you realize you would give them the same. Or how about joining a couple who tend to pick fights and insult each other more than they compliment the other? Being an eyewitness to this type of behavior immediately makes you vow to never put yourself in a similar situation. No matter what type of relationship you’re experiencing as a third wheel, you can re-evaluate your own dating goals and standards based on how closely you want your love life to resemble your couple’s.
Whether you’re on the market temporarily or perpetually single, like me, make the most of the inevitable third wheeling. It will only be as bad as you make it out to be.