From a young age, a romantic relationship is what many are taught to prioritize in a world that is so obsessed with them; the hallways at school are filled with couples holding hands or smiling in each other's embrace, there are those mushy-gushy social media anniversary posts, and overplayed songs on the radio that only have to do with love. For years these things served as reminders that I felt inferior to others due to not having a boyfriend. No "promposals" or a stuffed teddy bear and roses on Valentine's Day. I seemed to be part of the small percentage who had not found the love of their life throughout middle and high school. Over time the realization dawned upon me that happiness comes from more than just a significant other, it comes from everywhere. Below are just a couple of examples of how I have felt love and fulfillment through ways other than having a "bae".
1. Being "alone" is almost non-existent in a place where there are millions of people available at our fingertips to communicate with.
Online communities such as Tumblr, Youtube, Twitter, and Instagram offer great opportunities to interact with people who share the same interests as you. Seconds after tweeting about being upset a notification appears displaying the message an internet friend sent, brightening your day.
2. There are friends close to home, too.
Who needs a prom date when you can just go with a group of pals anyway? Forget the corsages and boutonnieres! Some of my happiest moments have come from jumping on the trampoline and talking in the backyard of my long-time friend, Savannah. I do not need someone to send me "good night" or "good morning" texts when my phone is already filled with kind, caring messages whenever I am feeling down.
3. You cannot leave out family, which displays a kind of love that is unlike anything anyone else could give.
The love of a mother, father, grandparent, aunt, or uncle is one that can never be overlooked or taken for granted. My dad knows that a Dr. Pepper after a long day of school on a Monday is one way to cheer me up; my aunt goes the extra mile to support my siblings and I when my dad cannot; I never feel isolated with a sister to share a room with and brothers that are willing to sit through choir concerts for just to hear one song from my ensemble.
4. Hobbies, activities, and events can fill the "empty spaces" that dates might take up.
Go outside and run, jog, or ride a bike. Are you a fine arts person? Devote your time to something like band, choir, orchestra, or theatre. Once you find your niche, you will discover that spending money on those dance shoes probably means more than going out to eat with some guy who never really had feelings for you.
5. And the greatest love of all never goes away: God's love.
No matter what is said or done, God's love is always there. He is my rock whenever I feel unimportant, lost, or confused. Along with that, God has allowed me to grow close with a youth group that shows me the same endless love that the Lord does.
What I am basically trying to say is do not let the idea of needing a boyfriend or girlfriend be a permanent part of your mindset. Numerous individuals, whether you are aware of it or not, care immensely about you. Despite relationships being the social norm, do not let that determine your self-worth or the way you view yourself or others. So crank up that Taylor Swift song without remorse, and go to that party even if you do not have a hand to hold. Just remember that this is your life and you deserve to live it to the fullest, not just to please or impress someone else.
