Everyone in a sorority knows that the beginning of school is stressful but oh so exciting because of recruitment. You spend hours in the house every day for weeks getting decorations ready and practicing until finally its bid day and all of the work everyone put in pays off when the new pledge class. Girls tell you that recruitment is so much different after freshman year because you finally get to know how everything works. My experience with sorority recruitment was a little different. As a freshman, I didn't sign up for recruitment and I got an open bid in October. So throughout the week, active members get to tell their stories to potential new members (pnms) of what their recruitment process was like in order to relate to them. The story I told was a little different but I think it still gets the same message of how much love and appreciation there is in my sorority.

So, in high school, there are those girls who you know will be in sororities at big state schools and there are girls who know sororities aren't for them. I was one of the latter. The thought of paying so much money just to party and wear big tshirts wasn't appealing at all. Then I got to Millsaps and realized greek life here is so much different than the stereortype. These girls all love each other and work together to create a community of leadership and sisterhood. So even though I knew I probably wouldn't go through recruitment, I decided to go to open house and see what it was all about. I walked through each house, asking so many questions about what made girls decide on their house and why they chose to go through recruitment and the conversations were fine at each of them. But in the last house I went to that day, I knew something was immediately different. Rather than being sat down on a couch or chair with a girl talking to me from the floor, the other pnms and I formed a circle and the active members stood on the inside facing us. We were asked a question and talked for a minute then some music started playing and the actives played musical chairs but with pnms. The best part was, rather than just walking in a circle, they each showed off their best dance moves, being goofy with each other and really having a great time spending their Saturday with their sisters. We went through a few rotations and by the time we left the house, I knew that was where I wanted to go.

That night, I called my mom to tell her about how the day went. Eventually I straight up asked her "Mom, what do you think about me joining a sorority?" She paused for a moment and finally answered with "We can't really afford it right now. You can choose whether you want car insurance or a sorority. You pick." Now obviously there isn't a choice there so once I hung up I cried, feeling defeated. Recruitment week last year was one of the worst weeks of my life. I watched as my roommate and all of the other girls on my hall got ready each night, talking about how nervous they were and what great times they were having at each house. On pref night, I brought a bowl full of snacks and popcorn and gum to the room where all of the girls were waiting for their parties. I wanted so much to be sitting among them but I knew that I couldn't. On bid day, I sat alone while all of my friends opened their bid cards and got painted up in assorted colors of glitter. Eventually I couldn't take it anymore so I walked across campus to the tomb of Major Millsaps (creepy, I know but I was feeling pathetic.) I sat on the bench and cried by myself until the chanting started. I knew that all of the girls I had become close to in the past two weeks were having the best day of their lives waiting to run home to their new sisters and I was devastated. The chanting and screaming from the girls was sickening to me and it got so loud that I decided to go back to my room to try to block out the noise but nothing seemed to work. Eventually I fell asleep, soaking my pillow in tears.

Over the next few weeks, I decided I didn't need sorority life. I was almost angry at them. I got over that phase too but it took some time. I finally accepted the fact that I wasn't in a sorority and that was okay. Then one day after class, a girl came up to me and asked what I thought about greek life. I told her I couldn't afford it and that I wasn't really interested. But after that, I really started to think about it. At the time, I was working two jobs, and I had enough money so the only thing holding me back was I had no way to get in. Within twenty four hours I texted every person I knew from Phi Mu and asked them questions about their sorority and how much their dues were. I became *slightly* obsessed. Again, I called my mom and told her what I found out. Finally I said "If I pay for it myself, can I be in a sorority?" She told me something along the lines of "if this is what you really want to spend your money on, then do it.” I was beyond ecstatic that it was finally in reach. I didn’t know much about open bids but I figured if I let enough people know I was interested, they might consider me. A few days later, I was cleaning my room after study hall and someone knocked on my door. I opened it, and to my surprise it was some girls I knew from a different sorority on campus. They offered me a bid. I was shocked and didn’t really know what to say. I told them I would think about it because I wasn’t sure yet. I sat down on my bed and really considered joining. I really wanted to have sisters and they were offereing that to me. But I knew I didn’t have the same connection with those girls as it did with Phi Mu. Not five minutes after those girls left, I heard another knock on my door. When I opened it, one of the girls I play softball with was on the other side. She said “MK, I have something I want to ask you.” Then eight girls came into my room all wearing pink and they started singing and chanting and finally the girl said “MK we want you to be a Phi Mu.” I lost it and started crying from excitement. They went outside to decorate my door and I called my mom again, telling her I was finally in a sorority.

That night was my first experience with sorority and it was awesome. We got Bops Ice Cream to celebrate. I will never forget how excited I was to finally be a part of the organization that looked so genuine and fun. Little did I know how much I would learn from my sisters and how much Phi Mu would change my life in less than a year. In the past week, I have been so blessed to share my love for my sorority with the freshman class. I don’t know how things would have turned out if I had gone through recruitment but I do know that I wouldn’t change a thing because my sisters and my sorority mean the world to me. Yesterday I was able to welcome 17 new members into our sisterhood and I can’t wait to see them grow and I hope they begin to understand what it really means to be home.