Today, the word feminism has the power to instantly inspire some and spark controversy with others. It is a topic that when spoken about can cause some to have great pride and cause others to become very uncomfortable.

Feminism is a movement that has taken on a great deal of support and criticism in the last decade. Feminism, at its core, is the advocacy of not just women’s rights, but the equality of all sexes. Being a feminist does not mean you believe in dehumanizing men.

I understand that there are a few passionate feminists who have said a lot of controversial things that many, especially men, feel isolated by. In return, it makes it hard for those who feel isolated by feminism to stand behind the movement. However, every movement, religion, and cause has its handful of extremists that do not truly represent the organization they are a part of.

My goal is not to make anyone feel that feminism is the only way, or you are a bad person if you are not a feminist. Trust me, I understand the negative stigma that is often associated with the feminist movement. I used to be the first to stand up and declare that feminists were not only frauds but that they also hated men. I was always ready to defend my position of "meninism" against any, "pink hat feminist" that came my way. But then I became best friends with a few women who were passionate about feminism but still were understanding of me as a man. My goal is to tell you my story, and the understanding that I arrived at.

Last semester, I was able to live out my dream of living in our nation’s capital, Washington, D.C. During my time in Washington, I lived in a small apartment with three other unique and outrageously smart guys. Across the hall from our apartment lived four, unofficially five, passionate women. Each one of these women had their own view on feminism and each were impassioned in their own way to support equality for all.

Throughout my semester, these women became my best friends and I had the opportunity to hear their life stories. Lydia was one of the girls who lived across the hall, and she is as stubborn and expressive as I am. She was by far the most passionate feminist of the group. Our friendship started with me telling her that I was a "meninist" as a joke, just to see how angry she would get. However, I am thankful she looked past my spurring of her emotions, and we eventually were able to confide our life stories with each other. The stories she shared with me have stuck with me to this day and have shown me the great importance of standing up for equality.

Lydia is the most outspoken person I have ever met. The passion that fills her is greater than any other single human being I know. I got to hear stories of her running a half marathon after getting diagnosed with lung disease. I watched her stand up for what she believed in during class discussions even if it wasn’t the popular opinion. I debated with her daily about feminism, and each night was inspired with her fervent responses. Finally, I heard firsthand the crippling stories of discrimination and sexism towards her and toward all the women in that apartment.

I could not believe the stories I was told of other human-beings discriminating against them purely because they were women. It’s one thing to read an article about sexism, or even to watch it on the news. But to hear it first-hand from people you care about makes it way too real. I could not believe the injustice done to my friends by others, the last people that deserved what I was hearing.

Toward the end of my time in Washington, I began to reflect on everything that I experienced during my five months living on Capitol Hill. I reflected on the friendships I had created, and, of course, I thought of all the conversations I had with the women across the hall in apartment three.

I remember thinking how angry and frustrated I would be if my mother ever came to me and told me someone had dehumanized her because she was a woman. Also, I don’t know if I would be able to keep my cool if one of my sisters ever told me a story about being discriminated against purely because they are not a man. Finally, I had a moment of prayer, pleading that my future daughters would never have an experience equal to the stories that I have heard in their lifetime, and if they did they would have the fortitude and courage to take the highroad and not stoop to the level of their oppressor.

In this moment, I understood that I needed to advocate for the equality for woman, and for all. I realized that being a feminist isn’t only for women; it’s for men too. Even more so, feminism needs men to step up and support women. Now, I am not saying that women need men to accomplish their goals. What I am saying is that if more men stand up and voice their support for the women in their lives and equality for women, the feminist movement will only grow stronger and reaching equality for women will only come sooner.

I understand that many extreme stances have been publicly taken by some in the feminist movement, and many of these stances can easily make men feel isolated and provide a valid excuse for them not to stand for feminism. Yet I encourage all men to think about the women they love in their lives and imagine someone discriminating against them and treating them less than equal due to their gender. I hope when you think of that situation, it lights a fire inside your heart to stand behind them and defend them against anyone who believes they are less than equal. I don’t think all men need to become feminists, but I do believe only those who want to should. Furthermore, it is perfectly okay if a man does not want to become a feminist. However, I personally believe all men should at least let the women in their lives know that they are loved and that they will always stand by them.

Men are not greater than women and women are not greater than men. But we are the greatest when we stand together.