A lot of people claim best friends at a young age. The strong ties young children make in preschool, kindergarten, and even elementary school can last for many years, even a lifetime. Some claim their friends casually, throwing out declarations of friendship with their acquaintances, while other may take the subject matter very seriously, contemplating the true nature of his/her relationship between close friends. However, many friendship bonds end up breaking and both sides lose contact with one another through a falling-out, or just growing apart.

But what does it really mean to have a best friend? There are a huge number of amusing articles/GIFs online such as this Buzzfeed article. These “signs” may be true for some people, but true best friendship often goes deeper than sending unattractive Snapchats of yourself and/or being friends with your best friend's parents on Facebook. While your relationship with your best friend is individual and unique, there are a few invariable factors that everyone can count on from their best friend.

Best friends will tell you exactly what you do not want to hear. I’m not saying they are going to be incredibly discouraging and shoot you down every chance they get, but they will not sugarcoat the truth. You may ask them to console you if something went wrong, and of course they will because they would never hurt you with a malicious intent. However, if it were you that was in the wrong, he/she is not the one to say, “It’s okay because everyone else did it” or “Don’t worry, no one will know.” They will straight up tell you that you were wrong and should not have done something. While there are boundaries within a friendship, your best friend will push these boundaries to let you know what really happened and tell you if you did the right thing. Their words may seem harsh, but in reality all they are trying to do direct you on the right path.

When you’ve had a bad day or are just upset, he/she will always cheer you up. You could have done badly on a test, had a fight with another friend, or even just a bad morning. No matter what happens, your true best friend will always be the shoulder you can cry on, the ear that listens to your rants, and the one who will comfort you when you can’t move on. He/she will always put you first and make sure you’re okay before worrying about anyone else, even him/herself.

Best friends don’t find each other burdensome. This may seem like a no-brainer for some, but loading emotional baggage onto another person can become very tiring after a while. Especially for those who are prone to sharing, their friends may often feel weighed down by everything they are being told. Telling close friends about personal problems is not necessarily bad, but some may feel they have some obligation to take action because they know about your said problem. Especially if this happens multiple times, your close friends may feel like you’re demanding too much. On the other hand, your best friend will always be there to shoulder the burden with you. While they may joke around about how you have so many problems, they will never truly resent you for needing assistance and will invariably be there.

The bond between best friends may seem to some that it could be strong enough to last a lifetime. However, conflicting interest and different lifestyles can lead to the pair growing apart and becoming closer with different people. While they may remain friends, sometimes the title of “best friend” just doesn’t apply anymore. The separation of paths between the two would not be bitter if they had truly been best friends before. The level of understanding would be enough that, while there may be regrets, there wouldn’t be any hard feelings because he/she had been an integral part of your life. Sure, you may end up later resenting him/her for not sticking it out and remaining close, but it would only have negatively impacted the both of you. At least by knowingly drifting apart, there would be a mutual understanding and consent of why you are no longer best friends.

People acquire and lose friends all the time. However, it is those that stay with you throughout all your troubles and will consistently be there for you that are your true best friends. These characteristics don’t just apply to what your best friend does for you, but for what you do for your best friend as well. While certain characteristics may not be as applicable in most situations, when the time comes, true best friends will always rough it out and prove they truly care for you.