Imagine this: It's a cool summer night and you're going 50 in a 75 in the middle of nowhere with your windows down. All of the stars are popping out like light peering out of holes on a black canvas, and the music on the radio is singing that tune that sets your heart on fire. That is what I imagine when the idea of freedom pops in my head. It's this idea of a serene peace that can't ever be truly existent in a world where reality rules. The picture of freedom can be anything from climbing to the top of a mountain, to sitting down and reading a book with no distractions. It is a place of escape when the world gets too heavy, and that picture varies from person to person. I sometimes imagine this scene in my head when I am doing something I don't like. (Like work, school, or anything I am forced to do lol) It's a second of relief from the situation I am in. Like that feeling of reading a good book, it becomes a dreamscape that is better than reality. Often though I found out that there were many things in my life that were compromising that idea of freedom. See to me, the picture isn't literal. It is instead a metaphor that resembles the state of my emotions. When I let chaos in, it warps and distorts this idea of freedom. Sometimes, it becomes a person. Other times, an Idea. The biggest warped idea I have found in the pursuit of freedom is when the picture of freedom turns into money.

I'm Broke

To be completely vulnerable my bank account often hovers around the 50 cents mark. I have been completely broke for about two months, and honestly, it has been freeing. Stress about money is a huge compromiser of my freedom, and it got to a point that I let it have control of my freedom. I thought the only way to be free was to have money. Boy was I wrong. I've never been necessarily rich in my life when it comes to finances, but I did find a richness that trumped any kind of monetary thing. That richness comes by having a rich intimacy with Jesus. Before Jesus, my freedom was always under siege and quite honestly I lost that picture that I mentioned in the introduction. When I started loving him with my whole heart I started to realize that no matter what happens he will be there. Whether I have a million dollars or one dollar he is where my freedom lies.

Okay, calm down.

Now I bet I can guess what most people will be thinking after reading about how I don't care about money because of Jesus. (If you did a little eye roll that's okay.) Ten points to me if you were thinking something along the lines of, "Well Jesus can't pay my bills so I'm glad you don't care about money but I don't have that choice." Okay, but what if you do have that choice. If God is real, (which he is) then he is the one who created money in the first place. So, if he created it, then he has complete control of it, which means in a time of struggle we get the opportunity to ask him for it. Now don't get it twisted, God isn't a vending machine, and we can't just come to him whenever we need him and expect him to just hand over everything we need. Overall he knows what is best for our hearts, he will keep us safe, and no matter poor or rich he is the freedom that everyone needs.

Woah that was a lot.

If you are still reading this far I want to encourage you specifically. You know that little picture of freedom that you have in the back of your mind? That little place of retreat when the world get's too heavy to bear? Well, it's real, and it is possible to get too. Just keep moving forward. For me, I found that freedom in Jesus Christ, being his follower is what saved my life. While I think everyone should follow him, maybe you're not ready yet. So no pressure from me, I hope and pray you find that freedom in your own way. I hope you walk without fear of the future. I hope you know your identity as someone beautiful, amazing, and powerful. Just keep moving. Don't stop. Coming from someone who tried to stop his race early let me tell you, your freedom is right there in front of you. Keep Moving.

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